The Flying Deuces 1939 - Movie Quotes

[Stan and Ollie have just heard that they will be executed the next day]

Oliver Here's a nice pickle we're in. Shot at sunrise!

Stanley I hope it's cloudy tomorrow!

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Oliver Stanley, a miracle has happened. I've completely forgotten.

Stanley You mean you've forgotten Georgette?

Oliver Who's Georgette?

Stanley That's swell, now we can go home.

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Stanley [watching a pair of airplanes doing acrobatics] I wonder what keeps them up?

Oliver I don't know. But I do know what keeps me DOWN!

[firmly and deliberately taps his shoe on the pavement in front of him to indicate how safe and solid it is and how he never intends to let his feet leave the ground]

Stanley Yes, sir - good old Terracotta Firma for me!

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[last lines]

Oliver Hey, Stan! Look! I'm over here.

[Stan does a take - sees a horse in a pasture with Ollie's hat and mustache]

Oliver Well, here's another nice mess you've gotten me into.

Stanley Ollie, is that really you?

Oliver [as horse] Of course, it's me.

Stanley Gee, I'm glad to see ya!

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Oliver How much do we get for all this work?

Commandant One hundred centimes, a day.

Stanley Well, that's not bad.

Oliver How much is that in American money?

Commandant Oh, American money? It's equivalent to about three cents a day. Of course, it varies with the rate of exchange.

Stanley Well, how much do we get for overtime?

Oliver There ain't gonna BE any overtime. If you think that you're gonna get that much work outta me for three cents a day, brother, you are crazy!

Commandant Is that so?

Oliver Ab-so-lutely!

Stanley Yeah, and that goes for me too. Cause we don't work for less than twenty-five cents a day! Do we Ollie?

Oliver Uh-Uh-Uh-Uh - Uhhhh!

Stanley Mmh-Mhm-Mhm-Mhm - Mmhmm!

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Stanley What did you say in the note, Ollie?

Oliver I said plenty and if I could have spelled raspberry, I'd have told him a lot more!

Stanley That'll learn him!

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Oliver I'm in love.

Stanley You don't tell me! Who is it?

Oliver The most gorgeous creature in the world. Georgette, the innkeeper's daughter.

Stanley Well, I don't blame you. She sure is a swell dish!

Oliver She certainly - don't call her a dish! She's the girl that I'm going to marry!

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Stanley Is there anything else I can do for you?

Oliver Yes! Leave me alone!

Stanley Don't talk to me like that after all the hospital I've given ya. I've tried given you candy and a nice, fat, juicy steak. I've waited on you with your hands and feet! Tried to tell you that there's plenty more girls. You don't have to worry about that.

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Francois Pardon me gentlemen, what seems to be the trouble?

Stanley Well, if you don't mind, we're going to jump in the river.

Francois But, why commit such a foolish action? Surely, your troubles can't be as bad as all that.

Stanley Well, that's what I've been trying to tell him.

[points to Ollie]

Stanley All because he fell in love with a dame. Now, isn't the silly?

Francois No woman is worth that.

Stanley I should say not.

Oliver You haven't seen her. If you knew her as I know her...

Francois I understand. But, don't you get, there are plenty more fish in the sea.

Stanley He's not in love with a fish. It's a girl!

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Francois Well, advice is cheap. Maybe if you'd listen to my suggestion, your problem would be solved.

Oliver What is your suggestion?

Francois Join the Foreign Legion!

Stanley What for?

Francois To forget.

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Commandant I'll now assign you to your duties. Revely at five, you dress quickly, make up your bunks and get ready for inspection. Inspection until seven. Ten minutes for breakfast. You drill until one and march until four.

Stanley What about lunch?

Commandant You'll have that while marching. You have inspection until six. Fifteen minutes for mess. Kitchen duties until ten. Inspection until eleven. Then, taps. That is all.

Stanley [to Ollie] If we have to do all that, you won't have time to forget.

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Oliver Haven't I got enough trouble without you making it tougher!

Stanley Well, it's your own fault. If you hadn't fallen in love with Georgette, we wouldn't be here. We wouldn't have to...

Oliver Will you stop reminding me of that! Here I am, trying to forget and you keep talking about it all the time! Now, here's another day wasted!

Stanley Well, maybe you don't try hard enough. If you can't forget, why don't you try and pretend to forget.

Oliver How can anybody pretend to forget?

Stanley Well, I know if it was me, I'd sit down and relax. I'd close my eyes and I'd concentrate and I'd think of nothing. It wouldn't be long then. That's what I'd do.

Oliver Say, I think you've got something there.

Stanley I know I've got something. Why don't you take a whirl at it? Now, don't think of anything.

Oliver I won't.

Stanley I know it's tough to forget a swell gal like that. Gorgeous hair and lovely eyes. Beautiful teeth. Ruby lips. Mmm. Gorgeous. I can see her now.

Oliver Oh-oh-oh. So can I. - Will you shut up!

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Stanley Say, I thought you'd said you'd forgotten her?

Oliver Don't be silly! How could I forget my little Georgette?

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Francois Now, once more, I'm going to give you a piece of advice. Keep away from my wife! If I ever see or hear of you being in her presence again, I'll see to it that your worthless carcass lies sizzling in the desert sun at the mercy of the vultures! Do you understand?

Oliver Yes, sir.

Stanley [Francois turns and glares at Stan] Yes, sir.

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Stanley Say, where are we going?

Oliver This tunnel leads to the outside wall. We're making our escape.

Stanley Well, are we allowed to do that?

Oliver Go ahead!

Stanley I was just asking.