Kung Fu Hustle Movie Quotes
Barber
Why don't you train us to be top fighters... and we'll avenge them!
Landlady
Becoming a top fighter takes time, unless you're a natural-born kung-fu genius, and they're 1 in a million.
Barber
[Does martial arts routine] It's obvious I'm the one.
Landlady
[immediately punches him in the face] Don't think so.
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Sing's Sidekick
Memories can be painful. To forget may be a blessing!
Sing
I never knew you were so deep.
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Sing
I realized then that good guys never win. I want to be bad. I want to be the killer!
Sing's Sidekick
[looks up]
Ice cream!
[leaves]
Sing
Where?
[follows]
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The Beast
What is the name of your technique?
Sing
You wanna learn? I will teach you!
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The Beast
All I want is to kill you, or be killed by you.
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Landlady
You may know kung fu... but you're still a fairy.
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Brother Sum
Ever killed anyone?
Sing
I've always thought about it.
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The Beast
In the world of kung fu, speed determines the winner.
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Sing
No more soccer!
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Landlord
[commenting on Sing's newfound abilities]
If he studies hard, he could be a doctor or a lawyer.
Landlady
A stuntman, more likely.
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Sing
All right. Now, we will sneak attack and take out that old lady.
[throws knife, knife richchets off overhang and gets Sing in his right shoulder]
Sing
Erg... Well, I'll let you try one.
[stands beside sidekick]
Sing's Sidekick
[takes knife, accidentally throws backwards, gets Sing's left shoulder]
Sing
Ack!
[stands beside sidekick]
Sing
Look, just take the knife, aim carefully, and throw.
Sing's Sidekick
[takes knife, winds back to his right, kinfe sticks Sing in his left arm, handle flys off at Landlady]
Landlady
Who threw a handle?
Sing
Quick! Take this cage of snakes and throw it at her. The snakes will all bite, and our problem will be solved.
Sing's Sidekick
[takes cage, winds back over his head, snakes fall out the back of the cage all over Sing]
Sing
You idiot! Now what am I supposed to do?
Sing's Sidekick
Try whistling. I've heard that helps.
Sing
[whistes, two snakes bite him on his lips]
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Sing's Sidekick
You gave him your life savings?
Sing
Yes. I was saving to become a doctor or lawyer... but this was a chance for world peace.
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Sing
[to ice cream vendor looking at him strangely]
What're you looking at? Never seen a free ice cream before?
[runs away without paying, laughing maniacally]
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[the Soccer boy accidentally kicks his ball to Sing, who does a number of tricks with one foot]
Soccer Boy
Wow, can you teach me that?
Sing
Sure, lesson ONE!
[pops the ball, the little boy starts crying]
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Landlady
How come you became righteous? Have you anything to say?
[sing draws a stick of candy on the ground with his blood]
Landlady
I don't recognize this character. What are you trying to say?
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Sing
Fat woman, you're in charge here, right?
Landlady
[takes her shoe off, slaps Sing with it]
Fat woman, my ass!
Sing
I'm with the Axe Gang!
Landlady
[slaps him]
Axe Gang, my ass!
Sing
Boss!
Landlady
[slaps him]
Boss, my ass!
Sing
You have to pay our medical bills!
Landlady
Bills, my ass!
Sing
We're on the same side!
Landlady
Same side, my ass!
Sing
A snake!
Landlady
Snake, my ass!
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Brother Sum
Don't block my view!
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The Beast
[Grabs pistol from brother Sum]
Do they make these for men?
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Donut
[nearing death, grabs the landlord]
With great power comes great responsibility...
Landlady
Donut, you are badly hurt. You must keep still.
Donut
This could be the end of a beautiful friendship!
Landlord
Oh, Donut. Tomorrow is another day!
[Donut passes away]
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Brother Sum
[after dismissing Sing]
A bum like that could come in handy.
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The Beast
Child's play! I can stop bullets.
[smash noise]
The Beast
Whoa!
[looks down to see that Sing crushed his toe]
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Landlady
So you're on their side?
The Beast
Don't get me wrong! I only want to kill you, or be killed by you.
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Axe Gang Vice General
Who threw the firecracker?
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Donut
[in English]
What are you prepared to do?
Landlord
We can't understand what you're saying!
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Axe Gang Advisor
Let's kill them all and make this place a brothel.
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Sing
Wow, that's a big fist!
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Sing
[after noticing the Two Harpists carrying their covered-up harp on their back]
Sing
They look like two gravediggers taking one of their customers for a walk.
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Sing
NO SOCCER!
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Landlady
[to Tailor]
What's with the red underwear?
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