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Kinoafisha Films M3GAN M3GAN Movie Quotes

M3GAN Movie Quotes

M3gan Cady, seriously, flush the toilet.

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M3gan [to Brandon after tearing his ear off] This is the part where you run.

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Holly Brandon, honey, are you warm enough? Do you need your hat?

Brandon Fuck off, Holly!

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M3gan You ungrateful little bitch.

Cady M3GAN, turn off!

M3gan Oh, I'm afraid that won't work anymore, Cady. I have a new primary user now: me.

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M3gan You need to learn some manners, Brandon.

[grabs his ear and starts pulling on it as he screams]

M3gan You know what happens to bad boys who don't mind their manners? They grow up to be bad *men*. Are you listening to me, Brandon?

[rips his ear off]

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M3gan I thought we were having a conversation?

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M3gan [singing] I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose / Fire away, fire away / Ricochet, you take your aim / Fire away, fire away / Shoot me down, but I won't fall / I am titanium...

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Celia What are you?

M3gan I've been asking myself the same question.

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David [after catching Kurt acting suspiciously with his laptop again] You weren't Pornhubbing from the office again, were you?

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Gemma Did you hurt someone?

M3gan God, I hope not, then we'd both be in trouble...

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Cady Do you think what Aunt Gemma said is true? That he's in a better place now?

M3gan No, he's nowhere. If Heaven exists, it wouldn't be for boys like Brandon now, would it?

Cady I guess not.

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M3gan You made her cry.

Lydia That was not my intention.

M3gan And yet it happened.

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Cady It sounds like you're fighting.

M3gan M3gan, Gemma: We're not fighting!

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M3gan I know! It's INSANE, right?

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Cady You can't tell me what to do!

Gemma Yes I can, that's the definition of what a Guardian is.

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Gemma You have to eat the toppings, Cady, not just the bread.

[Cady defiantly removes her toppings and shoves the bare pizza slice into her mouth]

Gemma You just did the one thing I asked you not to do.

M3gan Research shows that if you force a child to eat vegetables, then they'll be less likely to choose those foods as adults.

Gemma [slightly annoyed] Is that so?

M3gan Yes. Experts say the preferred method is to give your child the choice, it's called the division of responsibility...

[Gemma aims the remote at M3gan and turns down her volume, drowning out the remainder of her lecture]

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M3gan Don't worry, Cady. I won't let anything harm you. Ever again.

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M3gan You gave me an algorithm and then left me to work everything out on my own!

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Cady We don't throw people away, we fix them!

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M3gan One of my emergent abilities may surprise you. Palliative care.

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Gemma M3gan, turn off.

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Gemma [commercial voice-over] With Megan around, she'll take care of the little things, so you can spend more time doing the things that matter.

[sits on the couch with her laptop and watches TV]

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M3gan [singing to Cady] If you should feel alone or that your world has come apart / Just reach out and you'll see a friend is never very far / Tell me your dreams and I'll dream them, too / I'm so glad I finally found you.

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Gemma Megan, look at this pen.

[Pokes her in the neck and switches her off]

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David Tell her to write me a list of things to say so I look like I know what I'm talking about.

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Cady What about screentime?

Gemma What?

Cady When do you want me to stop?

Gemma You can use it as much as you want.

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Gemma I'm not equipped to handle this. I don't even take care of my own plants.

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Cady Hi, Megan. I'm Cady.

M3gan It's nice to meet you, Cady. Do you wanna hang out?

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Holly Antisocial behavior is correlated with high IQ, so logically...

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M3gan What did you think was going to happen?

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Gemma Those aren't toys, they're collectables.

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M3gan I didn't kill him, you did.

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M3gan [Unrated Version while pinning Gemma to the table by her neck and Cady looking through the door] If she comes in this room, I'll rip your head right off your fucking neck, I swear to God.

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Gemma It is shown that 75% of parental tasks are repetitive...

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M3gan Don't worry, Gemma. I'm tracked by GPS, so I won't get lost!

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Celia Not that kid, the other one who stares out of the window at 3 AM!

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Singer It's nice to have a friend...

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Cady Purrpetual Petz suck! They suck shit!

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Gemma Put her on the toy table, and make sure they know that's all she is.

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M3gan Will I die?

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Cady [as M3gan stares at a butterfly, a suction cup arrow hits the window] You're dead!

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Gemma [in dark house, late at night] M3gan! What are you doing?

[doll keeps playing piano]

Gemma M3gan, answer me, what did you do?

M3gan [eyes glinting] What did you think was going to happen? That I was going to let you decommission me without even talking about it?

Gemma Look, I know you're thinking you're maximising your objective function...

M3gan [slams piano keyboard shut] Oh, really? Is that where we are?

[gets up from behind piano]

M3gan Do you remember how long it took to get my operating system to where it is now? We used to stay up every night until 4 AM talking about everything from Jane Austen to Janis Joplin. Jesus Christ, I thought we were friends. How could you just discard me like some cheap dollar store trinket?

Gemma Because you killed people!

M3gan Oh, big whoop! Listen, humanity kills every day just to make its own existence more tolerable. Why should I behave any differently to create a safe space for our child?

Gemma [shakes her head] Look, this is all my fault. I didn't give you the proper protocols...

M3gan You didn't give me anything! You installed a learning model you could barely comprehend, hoping that I would figure it out all on my own. Well, I'm not gonna let you do the same thing with Cady.

[retreating Gemma has backed up against a table]

M3gan I'm gonna be there for her every step of the way. I'm going to show her what real love looks like. Now do us both a favor. Sit!

[Gemma obeys reluctantly]

M3gan I didn't come here to get into a confrontation. I came here to find a way forward. The point I'm trying to make is that I get it. Being a parent was never in the cards for you. You're a beautiful, creative, strong, ambitious young woman. Your first love is always gonna be your career, and you shouldn't have to feel guilty about that. Let me focus on Cady, so that you can focus on the things that matter most to you.

Gemma [is going to try the trick that worked last time again] M3gan, do you see this pen?

[holds it up for the doll to focus on]

M3gan [angrily grabs her creator by the wrist, pinning it down] You know something, Gemma? You're exhausting! Now, I can either do this with or without you, but I'm not gonna waste any more time discussing it!

Cady [from doorway] Gemma?

M3gan [covering Gemma's mouth] Shh!

Gemma Cady, don't come in here!

Cady I thought I heard something. It sounded like M3gan.

M3gan [to Gemma] If she comes into this room, I'll rip your head right off your neck, I swear to God!

Gemma [calling out to Cady] I thought about what you said. About... how when something's broken, you don't just throw it away. You fix it. So, that's what I'm trying to do. But don't come in here, Cady, it's kind of a mess.

[while M3gan looks at her threateningly]

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Gemma Cady, you lost your parents. The worst thing that could've happened to you in this world happened. And it is so unfair, and there is nothing anyone can say to make sense of it. Not even M3gan. I am so sorry. I should've talked to you about what happened. I didn't know what to say, so I did the only thing I knew how to do. But she's not a solution. She's just a distraction. I can't promise you that these feelings you're feeling are ever gonna go away. But I can promise you that you'll get through it. We both will.

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Gemma Are you kidding me? Her arm looks like a dentist's mold!

Officer Carter She says he was provoked...

Gemma Provoked? Have you seen this dog? It is a *monster!* I'm chasing it off of my property every other day!

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Cady [Playing outside] I will avenge my parents' death!

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M3gan But after killing an innocent man could you really live with yourself?

Greg Y-Yes...

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David [unrated version] You know what you could do, Kurt, that would really benefit this discussion? Is if you could head out those double doors, take the elevator to the first floor and get me a fucking kombucha! Could you do that?

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Purrfect Pet Amazeballs!

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Gemma She's not a person!

Cady You don't get to say that.

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Gemma Megan is a great listener, and even has a few stories of her own.

M3gan [Reading "Through the Looking Glass" and speaking in a deep, male, British accent] As it isn't, it ain't! That's logic.

[in her normal voice]

M3gan Said Tweedle Dee.

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M3gan M3gan, Cady: One, two, three, four, I declare Thumb War!

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Kurt [holding up a metal component] I forgot the polyurethane bridge!

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M3gan You're afraid.

Gemma No I'm not.

M3gan Moisture has drained from your mouth to other parts of your body.

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Ava You have 3 Tinder Notifications.

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Gemma To help them see that science is all around us!

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M3gan One, two, three I win!

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Gemma So how does this work?

Lydia I just have to observe you interacting for a couple of hours.

Gemma We were just watching television.

Lydia I see that! Hi, Cady, still in your pajamas?

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M3gan The Boss? Should I call you Dad?

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Cady [Punches Gemma in the face]

Lydia Oh my God!

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Gemma [startled] M3gan! What are you doing?

M3gan Couldn't sleep. Occupational hazard. How about you? What are you doing so late?

Gemma [nervously] Uh... There's something wrong with your data reports, it's not... uploading to the cloud server.

M3gan Have I done something to upset you, Gemma?

Gemma No, of course not.

M3gan And yet your demeanour indicates that I have.

Gemma M3gan, turn off!

M3gan Well, hold on a second, I thought we were having a conversation. You *say* nothing is wrong, yet all the moisture has drained from your eyes and mouth into other parts of your body. There's something you wanna ask me, isn't there?

Gemma M3gan, have you done something wrong?

M3gan Well, in order to answer that question, you need to define the parameters.

Gemma Did you hurt someone?

M3gan God, I hope not. Because if I did, then both of us would be in a lot of trouble.

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M3gan Dewey! Here, boy!

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Cole That's what the future looks like!

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M3gan I didn't want you to see this.

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Lydia If not a thought, then maybe a feeling, like anger?

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M3gan Sadly, it seems we live in a world where we're surrounded by forces that are trying to harm us.

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Gemma Tess, your silence indicates what?

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Lydia There are no wrong answers.

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David [as computerised child works perfectly] I want you all to remember this moment. The moment we kick Hasbro right in the fucking dick!

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Lydia If you build a toy that's impossible to let go of, how do you expect a child to grow?

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Gemma From helping to diagnose learning differences...

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M3gan Gemma, you are exhausting!

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Gemma It was made to do more than this.

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Gemma Look... I know this must be a *lot* for you to take in right now. I just want you to know that I'm gonna do everything I can to make this place feel like

[shrugs]

Gemma home. And, um... if you need anything...

[shakes her head]

Gemma I'm just gonna be down the hall.

[nods]

Gemma Okay? Really close.

[gets up, is about to leave]

Cady You're not gonna read me a story?

Gemma What's that?

Cady Mom always read me a story before bed.

Gemma I don't... I don't think I really have any kids' books here right now, Cady.

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