Beau Is Afraid Movie Quotes
Angel
Yes, push forward. Pray that you learn valor and be given luck. You will walk many miles. Dozens will become hundreds. Hundreds will become thousands. You will pass through countless villages. But finally, one village will speak to you. Some deep, essential part of you will recognize it, and you will say "This village is mine." You will learn a trade. And eventually, earn a living. You will know the pleasure of tasting fruit and bread and wine that is yours because you have earned it. You will find a plot of land and build a house with your own hands. You will cultivate the land. You will live off it. You will come to make new friends. One day, you will meet a woman. The story of your meeting will change, according to who tells it; that you were lost, that she helped you find your way, or that she was off course and you guided her home. She will see your fears and your pain and your dreams and your potential. And you will see hers. In finding your other half, the gifts of your life will multiply. Sometimes, she will look like a man to you. She will become pregnant because you have sex with her. You will have children, three sons. You will teach them what you know and you will tell them you love them every day. They will grow into handsome boys, blessed with courage and kindness and ambition. You will share your feelings of pride with your therapist. He will archive them. One day, a historic storm will sweep through your village and destroy your home. You will be carried away by a great flood. You and your family will be separated. And you will be deposited in a strange country. You will look for your family for days, then weeks, then months. So many months that you will come to lose count, but you will not find them. You will try to find work to support your continuing search but no one will speak your language. You will be treated like a criminal. Eventually, you will come upon a village wracked by an inexplicable plague. As you pass through, a man deranged by tragedy will identify you as the beast who burned down his home and replaced his children's feet with their hands. You will try to argue your innocence, but this will only make you sound more guilty. You will wonder yourself whether you are guilty. You will flee. Mad with vengeance, they will send an attack dog to pursue you. It will tear through the world to find you. You won't know this, but you will sense it. And you will keep a detailed record of these impressions in a log, and over time this log will become many logs. Your adventures will continue for years and years. You will learn to distinguish birds by their call and you will know every tree and plant by its name. Abandoning all comforts, you will condition your mind to new ways of seeing. You will experience great highs and profound lows, and you will look for your family until your life shrinks and fades into the dream of a ghost. You will come to wonder if they ever existed. Finally, when you are old and frail, you will collapse in exhaustion.
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Toni
I'm not asking you to leave, I'm asking you to fucking drink this fucking paint with me!
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Mona Wassermann
You think a mother could even help but see through her son's blatant *lies and *falsehoods and endless schemes? You think this is any different from the time you gave me the exact same CD for my birthday that you gave me the year before, and which you also gave your fucking high school counselor? Or when you bought me that kitchen set the very week after I *publicly swore off cooking? Even when you were a baby, you rejected me and refused to breastfeed while every other smug cunt on the street had happy, docile babies sucking their tits dry!
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[first lines]
Beau Wassermann
I accidentally drank mouthwash Friday night. You can't get stomach cancer that way?
Therapist
Not from one time.
Beau Wassermann
I drank a mouthful a couple of weeks ago too.
Therapist
I'm sure it's fine.
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Beau Wassermann
I really thought I was gonna die, my whole life.
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Grace
Jeeves, rip him apart!
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Roger
Oh, and I'm giving Jeeves his medicine, so if you hear him screaming, he's just asleep.
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Elaine Bray
I really felt that. God, that was so hot. You just busted through that bag.
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UPS Guy
Look, I never would have gone inside if-- if uh... the dogs on the street hadn't been going nuts and I hadn't had smelled that smell and the door hadn't been half opened, that's the only reason I went inside.
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[last lines]
Beau Wassermann
Mommy, please! Please, help me, please! Please, oh God, please! Help! Help me! Somebody help me, please! Help! Help! Help me, please! Help, please! Please, I don't wanna die, I don't wanna die, I don't wanna...
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Young Mona
He died on our wedding night. The same night you were conceived. He died the very instant you were conceived.
Boy Beau
How?
Young Mona
By finishing. Into me. He had a heart murmur, just like you.
Boy Beau
Did it hurt?
Young Mona
I'm sure it was excruciating. It was the first time we made love. The first time either of us made love with anyone. Your grandpa and your great-grandpa died the same way. But he thought he might be different. I'm just as guilty. I urged him on. I wanted a normal life. I wanted a child. He died on top of me. Inside. I think about it and I want to rip my ears off. But then... but then that same trauma, which changed me so utterly, also resulted in the greatest gift of my life. I am so sorry for what your daddy passed down to you. I can't tell you how sorry I am.
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Beau Wassermann
Excuse me, sir, m-my bag and my key w-were just here...
Superintendent
[grinning]
You're fucked, pal.
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Beau Wassermann
[as Toni begins drinking paint]
No! Please, Toni no! Stop, please! You're gonna be sick! Stop! Stop!
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Graffiti
Hail Satan, Shoot Dope, Kill children, Fuck the Pope.
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Grace
There was a stabbing... you were assaulted.
Beau Wassermann
What?
[cut to a brief scene of Beau getting viciously stabbed in the stomach and multiple times in the hand]
Beau Wassermann
What?
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Mona Wassermann
I'm sure you'll do the Right Thing.
Beau Wassermann
What is the Right Thing?
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[Beau has what appears to be an ankle monitor strapped around his foot]
Beau Wassermann
What is this?
Roger
That's my little assistant health monitor.
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Roger
Your testicles are extremely engorged.
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Cop
Freeze!
Beau Wassermann
I'm Frozen!
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Beau's Attorney
HE WAS AFRAID!
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Eye-Gouger
[Gouging Eyes]
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Mona Wassermann
Do you know what I had to go through to bring you into this World?
Beau Wassermann
I'll make it up to you!
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Rabbi
Mona, who was terrified of Squirrels...
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Mona Wassermann
You let things happen to you. Do you think that makes you innocent?
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Minstrel
When troubles come they come not single spies but in battalions.
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Beau Wassermann
I'm on my way, I just -- it's not safe, is it? What do you think I should do?
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Mona Wassermann
I am so sorry for what your Dad passed on to you.
[Munchausen by Proxy 101]
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Therapist
[Watches Mona being strangled, then disappears]
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Cheapo Depot Cashier
Don't curse me, my friend! I'm not the one.
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Teen Elaine
Are you a virgin?
[pause]
Teen Elaine
Well, it doesn't matter. I am too. I mean, who gives a shit?
Teen Beau
I have to; it's very dangerous for me. It's genetic. My father died.
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Orphan Ladybug Man
We like to Blur the Line between Performer and Audience Member.
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Monster
[Left alone to recover from severe wounds]
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Toni
[Popping pills like sweets]
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Mona Wassermann
That wasn't a dream, it was a memory!
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Therapist
[Happy about Nothing]
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Beau Wassermann
[Eats a frozen meal from a company his mother owns]
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Mona Wassermann
You're big enough to hurt Mommy, you're big enough for this!
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Mona Wassermann
We don't talk about you any more!
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Rabbi
Her son Beau, who has elected not to be here today...
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Toni
I'll get her to pull my hair so hard my scalp detaches, and then say you did it.
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Elaine Bray
It hasn't affected your virility, you're crazy hard right now.
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Beau's Son
You never did it? How did you have us?
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UPS Guy
She has no Head or Face.
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Mona Wassermann
You've been going around your whole life asking "If I do this, will I avoid this?" As if you don't have the Mechanism!
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Beau Wassermann
[Staggering away from his Mother's house, in the dead of night, with his face fixed in a crazed rictus. As well he might]
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Beau Wassermann
[Pukes on a Laptop]
Toni
LIKE, WHAT THE FUCK?
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Therapist
Do you ever wish she was dead?
Beau Wassermann
God, no!
Therapist
It wouldn't be so crazy if you did. Conflicting feelings can coexist. This is a space to explore them.
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Mona Wassermann
Oh, please, carry on like I'm not here.
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Ceiling Man
[For it was he]
Help me! Help me! Help me! Help me! Help me!
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Toni
Have it your way, you Goddamn Pussy Faggot.
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Dr. Cohen
When his horrific friends broke into his Mother's room and examined and then stole her undergarments!
Beau Wassermann
They pressured me!
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Mona Wassermann
Do you want to know the Truth, now?
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Beau Wassermann
What did I do?
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Elaine Bray
The Dragon's Lair!
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Mona Wassermann
That was your Father!
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Teen Elaine
Is your Mother a Cunt?
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Graffiti
[Unspeakably Obscene Cartoon] Don't mind if I do!
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Beau Wassermann
[Walks 500 miles, then walks 500 more]
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Mona Wassermann
Men are Blind.
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Toni
It's three things.
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Sign
Jesus sees your Abominations.
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Mona Wassermann
I see you noticing certain types. A girl like that, confident and self-possesed, a man would have to match her. But you could. I'm proud of the man you are.
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Mona Wassermann
I wanted a Normal Life, I wanted a Child.
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Roger
That makes all the sense in the World!
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Mona Wassermann
He died on top of me, inside. When I think of it I want to rip my ears off.
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Mona Wassermann
Is my Baby fed, Healthy? Is he scared enough of the World?
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Beau Wassermann
Can you die from this?
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Roger
Don't mix those! Little asshole...
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Therapist
Break a leg.
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Angel
You know. Confess.
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Angel
You tell your achievements to your Therapist, who Archives them.
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Mona Wassermann
I couldn't restrain her from volunteering.
Beau Wassermann
For how much?
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Angel
You grieve well.
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Laughing Man
We're telling him to Jump!
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Mona Wassermann
You're going to start to hurt me.
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Beau Wassermann
She worked for you?
Mona Wassermann
I seriously doubt that, but if you're right you can tell her she's fired.
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Orphan Ladybug Man
I have no parents left, that's why I'm so bereft.
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Dr. Cohen
A seemingly innocuous ritual, always feeding the ducks at the park. And he never missed a chance to feed his Therapist's Fish. Very nice, very nice...
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Book
You don't have to be like this.
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Grace
Oh, that was a Bad Dream.
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Therapist
[Still making notes at the Show Trial]
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Dr. Cohen
On his way to Scapegoat his Mother again...
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Dr. Cohen
But when he meets a Human Beggar...
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Dr. Cohen
And he gives the tributary offering intended for his Mother, to a dim-witted slut just because she made slant-eyes at him!
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Monster
My beautiful boy!
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Actor
What Fate is this to choose between two unmarked paths?
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Cop
Please don't make me do this!
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Giant Chicken
[Waves hello]
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Actor
Those are Funeral Horns!
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Sign
[Therapist's Office] To refrain from evil and from strong drink and to be always steadfast in virtue, this is the good luck. Buddha.
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Actor
Damn these Crossroads!
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Actor
[In Conference with a Frog, a Clam, a Robot and a Tree]
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Beau Wassermann
Let's fix this!
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Strange Man
Beau! Run!
[Explodes]
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Orphan Ladybug Man
Fly Ladybugs, fly! Up in the Sky!
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Mona Wassermann
My Baby!
[Gunshot]
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Beau Wassermann
[Floating in Cold, Dark Empty Space]
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Beau Wassermann
Why did you Lie to me?
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Mona Wassermann
[Had investments in ADHD Medication]
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Jeeves
[Launches an unprovoked attack on the Monster]
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Beau Wassermann
[Electrocuted by a Health Monitor, Remotely]
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Grace
[Asks Jeeves]
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Teen Beau
[Screams himself awake]
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Grace
[to Beau, concerning her sidelined, now dead, daughter, still with paint around her mouth from attempted resussitation]
WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?
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Beau Wassermann
Hey, wait a minute! Why would you say that?
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Mona Wassermann
You know what I say when I'm asked how my Son's doing? I say "Your guess is as good as mine!"
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Therapist
Call me if you feel warm or your breathing changes.
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Toni
It's not like we have an empty room going completely unused.
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Beau Wassermann
Her head is gone!
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Beau Wassermann
I'm visiting my mother tomorrow.
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[after Beau awakens from being hit by a car]
Roger
Welcome back!
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Teen Elaine
Eclairs?
Teen Beau
People put razorblades in them.
Teen Elaine
Rainbow Cake?
Teen Beau
The Colours make Cancer.
Teen Elaine
Liquid Shit? Here, suck this off!
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Mona Wassermann
My Mother never touched me. I had not earned her Love.
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Therapist
So in the weaning process, she saw your autonomy as a betrayal?
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Therapist
So the Love was Conditional.
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Toni
Do it actually.
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Penelope
Aren't you a bit old to be getting Adopted?
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Toni
It's for your healing.
[Lying to get him to shut up for the drive]
Toni
Dad says you have to, pills aren't enough
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Beau Wassermann
I even have it in writing.
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Orphan #11
The head ones bleed like crazy. I should know, my Father bled to Death.
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Toni
Look, I have videos of you. I'll show them, I'll tell them what you did.
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Roger
Already in your PJs? We're right behind you, sport!
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Beau's Attorney
My Client was genuinely lost, and held back from her, fearing punishment!
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Mona Wassermann
Do you have a concussion, do you know where you are?
Beau Wassermann
I'm in my house.
Mona Wassermann
Actually it's my house. But my house is your house.
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Beau Wassermann
Wooooohh! Wooooohh! Wooooohh!
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Mona Wassermann
Some things are For Your Protection, Beau.
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Beau Wassermann
Oh my God!
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Mona Wassermann
Feed Harry!
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Beau Wassermann
I waited for you.
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Toni
You took my room, you took my Parents!
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Beau Wassermann
I cried for hours when I got the news!
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Angel
He spent his last dollar.
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Beau Wassermann
What do I do? What do I do?
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Orphan Ladybug Man
He has sacrificed nothing of any great value.
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Beau Wassermann
What does this mean?
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Toni
Meet my new brother!
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Mona Wassermann
Was she The One?
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Roger
Oh she's alive, that's nice!
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Mona Wassermann
Why isn't it crying?
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Beau Wassermann
I tried to stop her!
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Poster
Llama Queen.
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Poster
Desert Daze.
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Actor
I thought I knew despair, but with this Pain I cannot fathom relief.
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Actor
Hello, stranger! What is this Phantom?
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Singer
You can give your life, you can lose your soul.
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Poster
Imaginary Friend
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Poster
Dream Picnic.
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Toni
WHO DO YOU THINK HE SENT TO DO IT?
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Sign
I will cut off my hands.
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Label
Sauropod Scaffolding
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Sign
GRL
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Singer
And I need you, and I miss you!
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Actor
In losing my parents, I have lost my Self!
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Roger
You've been asleep for two days.
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Teen Elaine
There's a Dead Body in the Pool!
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Toni
You won't get fucked up with me?
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Teen Elaine
We're allowed to kiss.
Teen Beau
Who is?
Teen Elaine
But only for the next ten seconds! Ten, nine, eight, seven, six...
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Beau Wassermann
How could you do this to me?
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Segway Guy
Beep, beep! Coming through.
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Teen Elaine
My Mother's a Total Cunt.
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Orphan #11
Drink this. It helps me.
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Mona Wassermann
Nothing is more important than choosing the right companion.
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Mona Wassermann
Over 300 sessions and that's the most flattering you were about me!
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Penelope
Your new brother is so fat. Yeah, bitch, hit that!
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Roger
He split his head open. My Oldest Patient...
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Toni
He gave me a C minus because he wanted me. He should lose his job for wanting me. He'd never survive, he's like 200!
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Angel
You were so selfish in your own search that no-one could find you.
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Mona Wassermann
Only women know women.
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Beau Wassermann
No, no, no I know the Truth, now! My Father's Alive, I met him in the woods!
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Beau Wassermann
I knew you weren't dead, I saw the birthmark.
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Roger
False Alarm!
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Penelope
I see now, you've taken my boy and replaced him with a demon!
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Teen Elaine
Are you a Virgin?
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Beau Wassermann
I was a Coward.
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Beau Wassermann
What would be right for you?
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Penelope
I remember, I saw it. You're taking advantage of us.
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Sign
Life is better by the Beach.
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Grace
Oh, that's going to be blood...
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Roger
Not in this Condition.
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Mona Wassermann
[Bird screeches]
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Roger
[Takes Beau's Silence as agreement]
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Toni
Maybe we killed him!
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Beau Wassermann
Are you him?
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Mona Wassermann
Get back in there!
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Toni
Hypocrite!
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Mona Wassermann
What's next?
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Beau Wassermann
Am I dead?
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Grace
We're the only ones who would take him in.
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