Mamaw
Now get out before I cancel your birth certificate.
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Mamaw
I don't care you hate me. I ain't in it for popularity. You gotta take care of business, go to school, get good grades to even have a chance.
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J.D. Vance
Where we come from is who we are but we choose every day who we become.
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Mamaw
Everyone in this world is one of three kinds: a good terminator, a bad terminator and neutral.
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Mamaw
Cause family is the only thing that means a goddamn. You'll learn that.
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Mamaw
I coulda done better. But you, you got to decide, you want to be somebody or not?
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Lindsay
Don't make us your excuse, J.D.
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Young J.D. Vance
All you do is yell at me!
Mamaw
If you didn't act like a shit-for-brains, I wouldn't have to.
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J.D. Vance
Whatever better life my grandparents had chased up Route 23, they never caught it.
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Mamaw
Kiss my ruby-red asshole!
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Mamaw
You know what's interesting about the Poles? They bury their dead with their asses sticking out of the ground. That way they got a place to park their bikes.
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Mamaw
It's always someone else's fault.
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Rich
So, what's it like when you go back?
J.D. Vance
I don't really get a lot of chances to go back.
Rich
It must feel like you're from another planet.
J.D. Vance
Yeah, uh, you know, I guess.
Rich
Like, you know, 'Who are all these rednecks?'
[Rich laughs]
J.D. Vance
We don't really use that term.
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J.D. Vance
They were actually sort of hillbilly royalty because my Papaw was related to the guy who started the Hatfield-McCoy feud.
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Young J.D. Vance
I don't get why you ever left Jackson in the first place.
Bev
'Cause when you're knocked up at 13, you get the hell out of Dodge. That's why.
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Mamaw
Three years from now, those idiots will be on food stamps or in jail.
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Bev
Just wait till you get pregnant.
Lindsay
I'm not having a kid.
Bev
What, you think you're special? That's just what happens to girls.
Lindsay
Only girls that are stupid.
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Bev
I've had about all the Kentucky I can take.
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Mamaw
Wouldn't spit on her ass if her guts were on fire.
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Mamaw
If you got a problem with that, you can talk to the barrel of my gun.
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Bev
I could crash this car and I could kill us. Then you would know how lucky you are!
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Mr. Selby
You might think that algebra is jail, but it's not. It's freedom.
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Bev
You're a hillbilly loser. You ain't even got any of your teeth.
Ray
You junkie whore!
J.D. Vance
Hey, don't call my mom a whore, you son of a bitch!
Ray
She is a whore! She'll suck anybody's dick that's got one!
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Bev
You wanna go? And live with her? She's crazy, you know that. She's been crazy my whole life. But if you wanna live with that crazy old witch, you go right ahead. You two were made for each other.
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Mamaw
You might not make it, but you sure as hell won't if you don't try.
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Mamaw
You gotta take care of business, you gotta go to school, you gotta get good grades to even have a chance.
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J.D. Vance
Get the surp.
Usha
Get the what?
J.D. Vance
The surp. You can't have pancakes without surp.
Usha
Oh, my God, J.D. It's not 'surp,' it's 'syrup.'
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Young J.D. Vance
I wouldn't call Middletown civilization.
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Lindsay
Gainful employment was cramping her style.
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Bonnie (Mamaw, 30's)
You come home drunk one more time, I'm gonna light your ass on fire!
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Young J.D. Vance
You know, Chris, he... he calls him your flavor of the month.
Bev
What?
Young J.D. Vance
You know, he's met a few of your boyfriends.
Bev
You let that little shit talk about your mom like that?
Young J.D. Vance
No, mom, I don't let him! He just said it.
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Mamaw
You know, you can't have a goddamn hissy every time you have an off day.
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Young J.D. Vance
It's a gateway drug.
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J.D. Vance
Why are there so many fuckin' forks? Usha, what am I supposed to do with all these forks? They had two different kinds of white wine. It's like a test.
Usha
It is a test. Next time just say you'll have whatever's driest.
J.D. Vance
Driest, okay.
Usha
Listen, use the silverware from the outside in. If the knife has a funny edge, it's for fish. If the spoon's too big, it's for soup, and the spoon at the top, that's for dessert. Try this: put your first finger and your thumb together on each hand.
J.D. Vance
What?
Usha
Do it. Just do it. You have D for drink on the right and B for bread on the left. Got it?
J.D. Vance
Okay.
Usha
Now put your hands up to your eyes.
J.D. Vance
Now what?
Usha
[laughing] Oh, my God. You actually did it?
J.D. Vance
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm such an idiot. Why are you with me?
Usha
Well, because you're not a douchebag and you don't know how to use forks.
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