Daddy Day Care Movie Quotes
Ben
Nope.
Charlie Hinton
You turned my own sprout against me? Now you're gonna die!
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Charlie Hinton
Hey, man, how did it go in there?
Max
...I missed.
Charlie Hinton
Heh heh... what does that mean?
Max
I missed!
Charlie Hinton
Oh, hell, no!
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Charlie Hinton
So... what else can we learn about?
Jamie
Dolphins. Dolphins are good.
Max
Dolphins are fish!
Becca
No, they're not!
Max
Yeah-huh, they live in water!
Becca
That doesn't mean they're fish!
Charlie Hinton
Hey, hey, hey... Calm down now. Maybe we should just ask another question here.
Jamie
...Where do babies come from?
Charlie Hinton
Eh, eh... Y'know, why don't we go back to the dolphins, or something other than *that*?
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Ben
Remember when you broke my yo-yo?
Charlie Hinton
I did not break your yo-yo.
Ben
You did!
Charlie Hinton
I did not break your yo-yo.
Ben
Yes, you did!
Charlie Hinton
Your yo-yo was broke.
Ben
Yes, you did! Yes, you did! Admit-admit it! Ya killin me! Ya really killin me!
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Charlie Hinton
If you don't stop it with that Star Trek stuff, I'm gonna push you in that sticker bush.
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Kelli
Hi, are you the new daddy?
Marvin
I'm your daddy.
[wheeze]
Marvin
I'm not your daddy! I'm your baby's daddy! Er - I'm not your *baby's* daddy! I'm gonna be... I mean, I'm-a... I'm-a... I'm...
Phil
You're Marvin...
Marvin
...Marvin.
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Charlie Hinton
Today we need some organization and planned activities.
Phil
No. We need Ritalin and leashes, that's what we need.
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Charlie Hinton
Any boob can run a day-care center but it takes a family to raise some kids and that's what we're gonna be from now on, a family.
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The Flash
More chasing bad guys!
Marvin
Excellent idea.
The Flash
We can chase Joker.
Marvin
Well, wait a second, buddy. That's Batman's bad guy. You're Flash,. so you want to be chasing.
The Flash
Lex Luthor?
Marvin
No, that's Superman. You want to be chasing Captain Boomerang, Gorilla Grod, Reverse Flash.
The Flash
The Riddler?
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Mr. Carrott
B-R-O-C-C-O-L-I! I am the broccoli and don't know why! C-A-R-R-O and a T! Carrots are healthy for you and me!
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Phil
Let's get safety-gate crazy!
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Charlie Hinton
If you put your kids through this, they're gonna be miserable in four languages...
Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan
Five. We start Portuguese in the fall.
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Charlie Hinton
OK, you're gonna go out straight for a pass, and I want you to be my blocker. You're gonna come across and cut left and I'll...
Max
How 'bout we just run in a circle?
Charlie Hinton
...Yeah, OK, that's a better idea! How 'bout we just aaaallllll run in a circle?
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Crispin
[shouts]
Shut-up, Butthead!
Charlie Hinton
Shut-up, Butthead? I'm sure your mommy and daddy don't like you talking like that. When your mommy comes to get you I'm going to tell her what you said.
[Crispin kicks Charlies shin]
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Becca
We need more learning about things!
Charlie Hinton
More learning about things?
Becca
Yes. We're at a very critical age. You have to feed our minds!
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Jamie's Mom
Who are you going to call if there's any problem?
[gives her a phone]
Jamie
911, Mommy.
Jamie's Mom
Oh, such a good girl!
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Charlie Hinton
Wow, goats really love pie
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[last lines]
Charlie Hinton
Whoa! Hey, little man!
[looks around room]
Charlie Hinton
I'd say this wasn't a bad trade-off.
Ben
Yeah, Dad.
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Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan
Rock for Daddy Day Care... Do you know what this means?
Jenny
A... chance to prove ourselves in a little healthy competition?
Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan
No, you bubble-headed idiot. It's a deathwish.
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Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan
My dear Jennifer... In life, there are winners and there are losers; and to win, you have to play dirty!
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Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan
Family? What a laughable concept!
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[first lines]
Ben
Good morning, Daddy.
Charlie Hinton
Hey, Ben, how you doing, man?
[yawn]
Charlie Hinton
Oh, God. Daddy's got to get ready for work.
Ben
Can't you stay home?
Charlie Hinton
No, I got a big day at work today. A real big day.
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Kim Hinton
So, Pooch, how was your first day at school?
Ben Hinton
OK.
Kim Hinton
Just OK?
Ben Hinton
I don't know anybody there.
Kim Hinton
Oh, well, give it some time. You'll make some friends.
[to Charlie]
Kim Hinton
How about you, baby? How was your day?
Charlie Hinton
I lost my J-O-B.
Kim Hinton
You lost your J-O-B?
Charlie Hinton
I got F-I-R-E-D. Me and 300 other people.
Kim Hinton
They cannot do that! What about Jim Fields? Can't he do something?
Charlie Hinton
Jim Fields is the one that pulled the trigger. Now, he's not gonna be inclined to do anything 'cause when I found out it was him, I told him he could take a flying F...
Kim Hinton
Charlie!
[Charlie and Kim turn to Ben, who wipes his nose on the back of his right hand; they turn back to each other]
Charlie Hinton
H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P. Don't worry about this. I'm a guy in demand, and I'll have a new job in a week. A week.
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[after the failure of the presentation of Veggie-O's]
Jim Fields
We're killing it.
Charlie Hinton
Hey, come on Jim, we had one bad test and it's a hard nut to crack. Any fool can sell chocolatey chocolate balls and cotton candy-flavored cereal to kids, man.
[Jim takes out his notebook and a pen and writes something down]
Jim Fields
Cotton candy. That's not bad. Hey guys, look, I'm sorry, but it was a dog. Kids just don't want to eat vegetables for breakfast. Who knew?
Charlie Hinton
It's exactly what I told you six months ago when you put us on this project.
Jim Fields
You did? Well, it's not just Veggie-O's. We're shutting down the whole health division.
Phil
That's like 300 people.
Jim Fields
Yeah, it's just not a business we want to be in.
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Kim Hinton
Oh, don't forget about the orientation today.
Charlie Hinton
The what?
Kim Hinton
Chapman Academy? The preschool?
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