Funny Face Movie Quotes
Dick Avery
When I get through with you, you'll look like... What do you call beautiful? A tree. You'll look like a tree.
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Dick Avery
You ARE mad, aren't you?
Jo Stockton
No, I'm not mad. I... I'm hurt and disappointed and... and mad.
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[Dick kisses Jo]
Jo Stockton
Why did you do that?
Dick Avery
Empathy. I put myself in your place and I felt that you wanted to be kissed.
Jo Stockton
I'm afraid you put yourself in the WRONG place. I have no desire to be kissed, by you or anyone else.
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Dick Avery
Now when I say "go," walk down with fire in your eyes and murder on your mind.
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Maggie Prescott
Wait a minute. I understand the whole thing. She put herself in your place. All you have to do is put yourself in her place, and the two of you are bound to run into each other in *somebody's* place.
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Maggie Prescott
Look at her. I think her face is perfectly funny. The Quality Woman must have grace, elegance and pizazz.
Dick Avery
This is the first time I've seen you lack imagination. Every girl on every page of Quality has grace, elegance, and pizazz. Now, what's wrong with bringing out a girl who has character, spirit, and intelligence?
Dovitch
That certainly would be novel in a fashion magazine.
Dick Avery
Sir, I owe you a drink.
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Maggie Prescott
Duval, please! I can't hear myself think, and I'm trying to think in French!
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Maggie Prescott
[looking for signs of intellect]
Marion, dear... what are you reading?
Marion
[holds up comic book]
"Minutemen from Mars"!
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Maggie Prescott
Oh, she's just filled with virtues, isn't she? Only she's not wasting any of them on us.
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Maggie Prescott
The bones are good.
Jo Stockton
Suppose we just leave my bones alone.
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Jo Stockton
How could I be a model? I have no illusions about my looks - I think my face looks funny.
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Jo Stockton
Take the picture, take the picture!
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Maggie Prescott
Let's give 'em the old pizazz!
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Maggie Prescott
Lettie, take an editorial! "To the women of America...!" No, make it to the women everywhere. "Banish the black, burn the blue, and bury the beige. From now on, girls, think pink!"
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Dick Avery
Livin' is easy. Livin' is high. All good Americans should come here to die.
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Jo Stockton
If the individual rights are not respected by the group, the group itself cannot exist for long.
Maggie Prescott
What does that mean?
Dick Avery
Something like do unto others as you'd have others do unto you.
Maggie Prescott
[to Jo]
We're only going to do unto you for a moment and you have my word that it's no more than we would do unto ourselves.
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Dick Avery
Let me show you something.
[Serving wine and speaking in a friendly tone]
Dick Avery
Gentlemen: may I take this opportunity to tell you that you look like a mess of worms? And that you not only look like a mess of worms, but you ARE a mess of worms. And I'll bet you've been sitting at this table all these years because if you ever left it you'd be picked up on a vagrancy charge.
Old French men
[Nod and smile in enthusiastic agreement]
Dick Avery
Your defense rests.
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Dick Avery
Professor, I love every broken bone in your body.
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Jo Stockton
I was taught that I ought not expose my inner senses...
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Jo Stockton
What about these pictures?
Dick Avery
Well, we're using this shop as a background for some fashion pictures for Quality Magazine.
Jo Stockton
I'm sorry, but I can't let you do this. Dr. Post would never approve. She doesn't approve of fashion magazines. It's chichi and an unrealistic approach to self-impressions as well as economics.
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Maggie Prescott
[talking about the newest edition of her magazine]
This is just paper. And if I send paper to the American woman, I will have let her down! Oh, yes. D for down, D for dreary, and D for dull and for depressing and dismal and deadly!
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Dick Avery
We want to sit at your feet and learn. We have so much to learn.
Maggie Prescott
We sit at your feet humble and ignorant but so willing.
Jo Stockton
Look, you two just leave his feet alone.
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Dick Avery
Stop! Stop!
Jo Stockton
I don't want to stop I like it!
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Jo Stockton
A man of your ability wasting his time photographing silly dresses on silly women.
Dick Avery
Most people think they're beautiful dresses on beautiful women.
Jo Stockton
At most, a synthetic beauty.
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Dick Avery
My work is pleasant, the pay is excellent, and I get a trip to Paris every year.
Jo Stockton
I certainly envy you that. I'd be in Paris now if I could afford it.
Dick Avery
You'd have a ball. You'd go to a party every night, drink nothing but champagne, swim in perfume, and a new love affair every hour on the hour.
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Dick Avery
[singing]
I love your funny face, Your sunny, funny face, For you're a cutie, With more than beauty...
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Jo Stockton
Do we look like those people who run around gaping all day?
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Maggie Prescott
All right, girls, we've got to get cracking. To work and to Paris!
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Dick Avery
What you call funny, I call interesting.
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Jo Stockton
A means to an end.
Dick Avery
Or, a means to a beginning.
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Dick Avery
[singing]
I want to step out, Down the Champs-Élysées, From the Arch of Triumph, To the Petit Palais, That's for me: Bonjour, Paris!
Maggie Prescott
I want to wander ,Through the Saint-Honoré, Do some window shopping, In the Rue de la Paix, That's for me: Bonjour, Paris!
Jo Stockton
I want to see the den of thinking men, Like Jean-Paul Sartre, I must philosophize with all the guys, Around Montmartre - and Montparnasse!
Dick Avery
Dick Avery, Maggie Prescott, Jo Stockton: I'm strictly tourist, But I couldn't care less, When they parlez-vous me, Then I gotta confess, That's for me: Bonjour, Paris!
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Maggie Prescott
[singing]
This has got to be illegal, What I feel, Trés gay, trés chic, Trés magnifique, C'est moi, c'est vous, C'est grand, c'est too tout, It's too good to be true, All the things we can do...
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Dick Avery
Now, about the guest of honor, where is she? How does she look?
Maggie Prescott
If she's here, she looks invisible.
Dick Avery
She didn't show?
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Jo Stockton
I'm not mad, l - I'm hurt and disappointed and - and mad.
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Jo Stockton
I suppose you think the neckline of a dress makes for world-shaking conversation?
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Dick Avery
[singing]
It's most immoral for us to quarrel, Why can't we both agree? Don't you know Ben Franklin wrote about this thing at length? On the proposition that in union there is strength...
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Dick Avery
No more jokes. But let's be friendly. We have to work together, you know.
Jo Stockton
You don't have to be friendly to work together. Acquainted will do.
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Jo Stockton
This is where I get off.
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[repeated line]
Dick Avery
Wet your lips.
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Dick Avery
My friends, you saw enter here a waif, a gamin, a lowly caterpillar. We open the cocoon but it is not a butterfly that emerges.
Dick Avery
It's not?
Paul Duval
No. It is - a bird of paradise.
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Jo Stockton
Please, Dick.
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Dick Avery
My, my, my. Well, what do you know?
[singing]
Dick Avery
He loves, And she loves, And they love so, Why can't you love, And I love too? Birds love, And bees love...
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Jo Stockton
Oh, Dick, I thought it would never happen.
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Maggie Prescott
You're the authority on how to be lovely.
Jo Stockton
What am I going to tell them?
Maggie Prescott
Just listen and repeat after me.
[singing]
Maggie Prescott
On how to be lovely
Jo Stockton
On how to be lovely
Maggie Prescott
You got to be happy
Jo Stockton
You got to be happy
Maggie Prescott
When you can feel light and gay
Maggie Prescott
Maggie Prescott, Jo Stockton: Then you'll be lovely...
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Maggie Prescott
It's impossible! You belong to the fashion world. Face it, we're cold, artificial and totally lacking in sentiment. So, how could you possibly be in love?
Dick Avery
I'm a black sheep.
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Jo Stockton
If you weren't so deadly serious about all this, it would be terribly funny.
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Jo Stockton
You must see Greenwich Village. It's our Left Bank. People there think and do things. Useful things.
Prof. Émile Flostre
Do you live in Greenwich Village?
Jo Stockton
Oh, of course.
Prof. Émile Flostre
Then I will certainly come. Perhaps we can do useful things together.
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Maggie Prescott
[singing]
Clap yo hands, Slap yo thighs, Gimme that beat boy, Beat boy, Beat boy, Gimme that, Gimme that, Gimme that, Gimme that, Crazy knocked out beat!
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Jo Stockton
There's no reason why someone brilliant shouldn't be young.
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Jo Stockton
Professor Flostre, I came to talk with a philosopher. You're - you're talking like a man!
Prof. Émile Flostre
But I am a man. And you're a woman.
Jo Stockton
That's not what I came to talk about.
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Jo Stockton
I had no idea they were coming. And I can't think of what got into Dick.
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Dick Avery
You know the old saying: If you can't lick 'em, join 'em.
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Maggie Prescott
Well, you certainly fixed everything! If you can't lick 'em, join 'em and if you can't join 'em, lick 'em!
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Paul Duval
You'll never get in to Flostre's. Those Empathicalists have a very firm way of dealing with what they call - hostile vibrations.
Maggie Prescott
Oh, let's say we turn into a couple of friendly vibrations.
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Prof. Émile Flostre
You have the most penetrating eyes. I can still see them when I close mine.
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Maggie Prescott
I'll take care of Dick.
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Jo Stockton
Later. I've *got* to get to Dick.
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Prof. Émile Flostre
Your mouth suggests to me - burgundy velvet.
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Jo Stockton
'S wonderful
Dick Avery
'S marvelous
Jo Stockton
'S marvelous
Dick Avery
That you should care for me...
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Babs
Babs, Laura, Lettie: [singing] Feels so gay, Feels so bright. Makes your day, Makes your night...
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Jo Stockton
Dancing is nothing more than a form of expression or release? There's no need to be formal or cute about it. As a matter of fact, I rather feel like expressing myself now. And I could *certainly* use a release!
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Maggie Prescott
Girls, the eyebrows up, a light powder. I want a little rouge right here. She needs a *marvelous* mouth. The hair - the hair is awful. It *must* come off.
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Maggie Prescott
Ahh! Here it is. Here is our theme. Here is our answer. Pink!
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Dick Avery
All right, Marion, give me a *long* look. Longer. *Longer*.
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Maggie Prescott
In the 60 years of "Quality" magazine, this hits rock bottom. If I let this go through, I will have failed the American woman.
Babs
Babs, Laura, Lettie: Oh no, Miss Prescott, don't say that.
Maggie Prescott
The great American woman, who stands out there naked, waiting for me to tell her what to wear.
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Maggie Prescott
[singing]
Red is dead, Blue is through, Green's obscene, Brown's taboo, And there is not the slightest excuse for plum or puce - or chartreuse, Think pink! Forget that Dior says black and rust, Think pink! Who cares if the new look has no bust...
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Jo Stockton
I don't want my hair cut. I don't want my eyebrows up or down. I want them where they are. And I see no functional advantage in a marvelous mouth.
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Maggie Prescott
Straighten up, shoulders back. If you girls only knew how important posture is.
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Jo Stockton
This is my second and last encounter with you lunatics. You just keep your hands off me, all of you. I make a delivery and find myself being pillaged and plundered.
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Dick Avery
One never talks to Maggie Prescott. One only listens.
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Jo Stockton
[singing]
Oh, I feel, Like I could melt. Into heaven I'm hurled, I know how Columbus felt, Finding another world, Can I trust how I feel? Is this my Achilles heel?
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Maggie Prescott
She might do.
Jo Stockton
Might do what?
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