SailorHey, my snakeskin jacket! Thanks, baby! Did I ever tell you that this here jacket represents a symbol of my individuality and my belief in personal freedom?
LulaHe told me once he could find an honest man in Washington.
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Sailor[to Lula]The way your head works is God's own private mystery.
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Bobby PeruYa know, I sure do like a girl with nice tits like yours who talks tough and looks like she can fuck like a bunny. Do you fuck like that? Cause if ya do, I'll fuck ya good. Like a big ol' jackrabbit bunny, jump all around that hole. Bobby Peru don't come up for air.
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Sailor[Casually lights a cigarette as the gang members surround him]Ok, what do all you faggots want?
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OO SpoolMy dog barks, some. Mentally you picture my dog, but I have not told you the type o' dog which I have. Perhaps you might even picture Toto... from "The Wizard of Oz." But I can tell you, my dog is all ways with me. ARF!
SailorI guess I started smoking when I was about... four. My momma was already dead then from lung cancer.
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LulaSometimes, Sail', when we're makin' love, you just about take me right over that rainbow. You are so aware of what goes on in me, I mean, you pay attention. And I swear, baby, you got the sweetest cock. It's like it's talking to me when you're inside. Like it's got this little voice all it's own.
SailorIf ever somethin' don't feel right to you, remember what Pancho said to the Cisco Kid: "Let's win, before we're dancing at the end of a rope, without music."
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SailorMan, I had a boner with a capital "O". Anyway, I found her lyin' in a room filled with assault weapons and spank house magazines. So, I slid my hand between her legs again, and she closed her thighs on it.
LulaYou're excitin' me, honey. Then what'd she do?
SailorWell, her face was half pushed into the pillow, and I remember, she - she looked back over her shoulder at me and said: "I won't suck you. Don't ask me to suck you."
LulaOh, poor baby, she don't know what she missed. What color hair she have?
Bobby PeruI don't mean your head-head. I'm not gonna piss on your head, your hair and all, I'm just gonna piss in the toilet. Y'all take a listen, you'll hear the deep sound comin' down from Bobby Peru.
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Bobby PeruSpeaking of Jack, One eyed Jack's yearning to go a peeping in a seafood store!
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Marcelles SantosYou want me to shoot Sailor... in the brains... with a gun?
Marcelles SantosWrong. It's always better to blow a hole through the back of the head, right through to the bridge of the nose. Lots of irreparable brain damage.
LulaBut we better be careful. Cause Mama's gonna have Johnnie Farragut on us like a duck on a junebug.
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SailorThere's no need to make life tougher than it has to be.
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Marcelles SantosYou been crying? You gotta cut out this crybaby stuff, you know? You're my girl now, and Santos - Santos - Santos wants to wipe away the tears and make you happy.
LulaI can't take no more of this radio! I never heard so much shit in all my life! Sailor Ripley, you get me some music on that radio this instant! I mean it!
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LulaI'd go to the far end of the world for you, baby. You know I would.
SailorRockin' good news! Are those toenails about dry yet, sweetheart? We got some dancing to do!
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Marietta FortuneBuffalo hunting? I've gone buffalo huntin'? What the fuck does that mean? Buffalo huntin'!
Girl in Accident[looking for her wallet in her pocket]I can't find it. My mother's gonna kill me. It's got all my cards in it, and it was in my pocket, and now my pocket's gone. Gotta help me find it, my mother's gonna kill me. It's got all my cards in it, and it was in my pocket. It was in my pocket...
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Girl in AccidentMy purse is gone! My purse is gone, now she tells me!
SailorYou're gonna have to kill me to keep me away from Lula.
Marietta FortuneOh, don't worry about that. And before I do, I'm gonna cut your balls off and feed 'em to ya.
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Marcelles SantosGuess what? There's no turnin' back, remember? I am in a killin' mood.
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SailorHoney, you ain't gonna begin worrying now about what's bad for you? I mean, here you are, crossing state lines with a 'A' number one certified murderer. Murderer.
LulaA manslaughterer, honey, not murderer. Don't exaggerate.
SailorOkay, manslaughterer - who just broke parole and got nothin' in mind but immoral purposes, as far as you're concerned.
LulaThank the Lord! Well, you ain't let me down yet Sail'. It's more than I can say for the rest of the world.
Bob Ray LemonMarietta tells me you been tryin to fuck her in the toilet for the past ten minutes... How 'bout that, tryin to fuck your girl's mama... Tell me, what's that little cunt Lula think about that?
LulaI'm sorry, Sailor, but that ozone layer' s disappearin'. One of these mornings, the sun's gonna come up and burn a hole clean through the planet like an electrical X-ray.
SailorWell that ain't never will happen, honey. At least not in our lifetime. By then, they'll be drivin' Buicks to the moon.
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LulaMaybe my Mama cares for me just a little too much.
LulaDell said that trust in the spirit of Christmas was destroyed by ideas being controlled by aliens wearing black gloves. These aliens would get Dell to do all kinds of things. Then he'd carry on about the weather, talk about how rainfall is controlled by aliens on earth. Aunt Rootie told Dell that one day he would realize that the alien wearing the black gloves was him, and him alone.
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Marietta FortuneThe fuckah split!
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LulaDell loved Christmas. We used to call him "Jingle Dell".
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LulaOh, Sailor, honey, I hope seeing that girl die didn't jinx us.
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SailorI never had much parental guidance. That's what my parole officer said at my hearing.