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Kinoafisha Films Whip It Whip It Movie Quotes

Whip It Movie Quotes

Bliss Cavendar We deserve better villains.

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Smashley Simpson Smashley Simpson, Bloody Holly, Maggie Mayhem, Rosa Sparks, Bliss Cavendar: We're number two! We're number two!

Razor You guys came in second out of two teams.

Smashley Simpson Smashley Simpson, Bloody Holly, Maggie Mayhem, Rosa Sparks, Bliss Cavendar: Whoo!

Razor Yeah, let's celebrate mediocrity! That's fantastic.

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[Bliss finds Iron Maven waiting for her at the Warehouse]

Iron Maven Ruthless, Ruthless, Ruthless.

Bliss Cavendar [hesitatingly] Maven, Maven, Maven?

Iron Maven Hey, guess how old I am.

Bliss Cavendar [guessing] 27?

Iron Maven [not at all touched] Oh, that's sweet. I'm 36. Guess when I started skating. I was 31. 'Cause it took me that long to find one thing that I was really good at.

[Iron Maven stands, staring intently at Bliss]

Iron Maven And you know what? I worked my ass off to get it.

Bliss Cavendar [nervously] Yeah, me too.

Iron Maven [smirks briefly] It's too bad you're only 17.

[Bliss stares in shock]

Iron Maven What do you think the league is gonna say when they find that out? Or your teammates, when they find out you've been lying? That's gonna be rough.

Bliss Cavendar [pleading desperately] Maven, please, look...

Iron Maven [cutting her off] No, you look. One day it will be your time, Ruthless, but it's not your time now. And if I was you, I wouldn't even bother lacing up those skates.

[Iron Maven walks away, and Bliss hangs her head and cries]

Bliss Cavendar Fuck.

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Bliss Cavendar [helping Pash to the toilet] Come on, let's get this out.

Pash [belches low] It's cool. I swallowed it.

Bliss Cavendar Come on, just stick your fingers down your throat. You'll feel better.

Pash No! You stick your fingers down YOUR throat.

Bliss Cavendar ...Pash... you ever thought... about your parents making love... your dad's naked body...

Pash ...WHAT?

Bliss Cavendar His balls jiggling... sweaty?

Pash nnoo!

[throws up, heaving]

Pash [whimpers] That's not fair!

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Oliver Wow, from here it kinda looks like you're wearing a stryper t-shirt.

Bliss Cavendar stryper? Yeah, 80's christian heavy metal. I mean in the name of jesus we rock.

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Iron Maven Nice jump, Evel Knievel.

Bliss Cavendar Thanks. Maybe I'll teach it to you some time.

Iron Maven [a little surprised] Really?

Bliss Cavendar Yeah.

Iron Maven [smiles] Okay.

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Pash [On going to Austin, TX alone] But you don't have the balls.

Bliss Cavendar I can grow the balls...

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket Hey. Black Widows, my spidey senses are tingling. About to make a sequel in my pants

Eva Destruction Yeah? Spider-Man 3 1/2?

'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket Yeah, it is 3 1/2 inches. Wide.

[trombone noises]

'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket Air trombone, yeah.

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Earl Cavender I can take losing the money. I cannot take losing the chance for our kid to be happy.

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Earl Cavender I like smart girls. That's why I married your mama. Well, that and I knocked her up.

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[Bliss has knocked Corbi off a stair banister at school]

Colby You can't do that!

Pash She just di-iid!

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Corbi So, what are you, like, alternative now?

Bliss Cavendar Alternative to what?

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Bliss Cavendar Is this what you do with all the girls? Take them here to show off your skills?

Oliver Yeah, and it usually works too.

Bliss Cavendar Oh yeah? Maybe we should do something different.

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[Bliss is waiting on a table occupied by Corbi, Colby and their friends]

Colby What's the name of that thing that if I eat it real fast, it's free?

Bliss Cavendar That's the Squealer. You have to eat it in three minutes or less.

Colby [ponders briefly] Yeah. You bring me a Squealer. And I don't mean Corbi.

[Colby laughs and grabs Corbi in a groping hug, and Corbi mock-squeals loudly]

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Maggie Mayhem Ma'am, put down the lip gloss and step away from the mirror.

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Maggie Mayhem I'm Maggie, Maggie Mayhem.

Bliss Cavendar I'm Bliss, but I can change that.

Maggie Mayhem Yeah, you'll have to change that.

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Bliss Cavendar I'm gonna puke!

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Brooke Cavendar I'm supposed to buy you shoes from a... a head shop? Does that really strike you as responsible parenting?

Bliss Cavendar Fine, the shoes are a gateway drug.

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Brooke Cavendar What do you think, that the world thinks of those girls with all their tattoos? Do you think they have an easy time finding a job? Or getting a loan application? Or going to a decent college?

Bliss Cavendar I think it depends on the girl.

Brooke Cavendar Or finding a husband? No, you just limit your choices.

Bliss Cavendar Seriously, you need to stop. You really need to stop shoving your psychotic idea of '50s womanhood down my throat. And pageants? I mean, what have they ever done for you?

Brooke Cavendar That's my point, Bliss! I didn't have a mother.. to navigate all my opportunities.

Bliss Cavendar Jesus Christ. I am in love with this. I mean, don't you get it?

Brooke Cavendar It won't last. In two or three years, it'll be over. This is a moment.

Bliss Cavendar Well, how great is that?

Brooke Cavendar You don't understand. You will when you have to support yourself.

Bliss Cavendar I do support myself.

Brooke Cavendar No, you don't. You buy shoes.

Bliss Cavendar You're full of shit. You know what, actually...

Earl Cavender Hey. Hey, you calm down, little lady.

Bliss Cavendar Why don't you go back to your turtle shell so you don't have to freaking confront anything?

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Bliss Cavendar His name's Oliver. It's a great name.

Pash Yeah, if you like wayfaring Dickensian orphans.

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Brooke Cavendar I know that you're just too bohemian to care, but she has to cheer tonight.

Bliss Cavendar And she's gonna go through with it? What an athlete.

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Pash I didn't have a Barbie-roller-skating phase. Okay? I had a fat-kid-sits-inside- and-reads-a-book phase.

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Maggie Mayhem Ooh, jeans shorts.

Razor Every single day.

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Razor There's a lot more to derby than fishnets and picking out a tough name. This is a sport.

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Razor It's roller derby, not cotillion.

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Maggie Mayhem Looks like you've got some competition.

Iron Maven Yeah, yeah, wake me when she learns how to throw a hit. Or take one.

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Bliss Cavendar Hey, you're Iron Maven.

Iron Maven That's right, kiss-ass. Why don't you suck up a little harder? There's still part of your face that doesn't have doodie on it.

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Rosa Sparks All that "We're Number 1" corporate crap doesn't apply. Our bad attitude's an asset here.

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Birdman I mean, did anybody bother to think, "Hey, Birdman might appreciate hot girls in fishnets and roller skates beating the crap out of each other"? No, they did not.

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Bliss Cavendar It's the only cool thing you own.

Brooke Cavendar That you'd know about.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket This is a rough contact sport. These girls are lean, mean skating machines. And they gotta go fast if they wanna get past the blockers who are trying to knock them down. And by "knock them down," I mean "beat them to a pulp."

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket They say the Scouts have the most loyal fans, and being the worst team in the league, Lord knows they need them.

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Brooke Cavendar You think you have all the time in the world, but there's not many girls who are both smart and pretty like you. And I hate to admit it, but the pretty part doesn't last forever. You got to make the most of what you have while you can. Nobody tells you that.

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Bliss Cavendar Mom, you're still really beautiful.

Brooke Cavendar Save your sarcasm for later.

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Iron Maven What's up, Hurl Scouts? That was so good out there. It was really cute to see y'all trying so hard.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket Did Razor just coach the other team or did my peyote just kick in? I don't even know what's coming on 'cause I don't know what's coming around the corner.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket We've got two girls brawling on the track. I don't know whether to break it up or break out the video camera. Hell hath no fury like a woman fouled.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket By day, these ladies are your favorite waitresses, nurses, teachers. But by night these girls give the crowd what they came for.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket Fight Attendants, this Is your captain speaking. It's gonna be a long, bumpy ride back to Loserville.

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Bliss Cavendar Well, I didn't throw up.

Maggie Mayhem That'll do. Good thing.

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Razor We got to run the plays. We run the plays, we win the game.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket If you're still having trouble following the game, folks, don't worry, you're not the only one. We'll keep track of the score for you. You keep track of the fishnets.

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Bliss Cavendar Why do you feel like you have to lie to her?

Earl Cavender You gotta pick your battles with your mother because she is a fighter.

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Earl Cavender This Blue Bonnet deal means so much to her. And I think it's really nice, you going along. But you know there's more to life than beauty pageants.

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Pash You know what? I'm ecstatic that you have this whole new life and you have all new friends and it's great. But I'm trying to get out of this armpit of a town just as much as you. And last time I checked, getting arrested is not the kind of extracurricular that Ivy League schools are looking for. Do you really think that this roller derby career of yours is going anywhere?

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Pash If, you know, you hear a hint of pain in my voice when I say that I've lost my best friend.. to a gang of roller skating she-males and that the only highlight of my night was serving corn to an old man who can't even chew it, then I'd say you're wrong. I'm happy.

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Maggie Mayhem You can't understand until you have one. Everything changes.

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Bliss Cavendar But you're not really like her, though.

Maggie Mayhem Oh, I'm the cool aunt?

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Bliss Cavendar Please don't judge me right now.

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Maggie Mayhem Bliss, I know what it's like to wanna do your own thing. Believe me, I do. But maybe there's a way you can do it without making your parents feel like crap?

Bliss Cavendar What?

Maggie Mayhem I've just been thinking. I think maybe you're being a little selfish with your mom.

Bliss Cavendar Okay, no. She's the one who has been shoving her agenda down my throat since day one.

Maggie Mayhem First of all, you're lucky to have a mom that even cares. And just because she's wrong about derby, doesn't mean she's wrong about every single thing. And if Riley ever lies to me the way you lied to your parents, he wouldn't even be able to run away 'cause I'd break his legs.

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Bliss Cavendar I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

Pash I know. Just keep... Keep saying it.

Bliss Cavendar Yeah.

Pash Over and over again, please.

Bliss Cavendar Yeah, I will. I'll keep it up.

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Bliss Cavendar Did he turn into a handsome prince?

Pash No, he stayed a Birdman. But the worst part is, he's actually a good kisser. Really good.

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Brooke Cavendar Pretty vases.

Atomic City Clerk #1 They're great for tulips, really.

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Razor There're only 10 of them. It's not... not rocket science.

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Earl Cavender And had I known what you were up to, I would have bought a ticket.

Brooke Cavendar Earl.

Earl Cavender I mean, dang it, girl, what has gotten into you?

Bliss Cavendar Just defective, I guess.

Brooke Cavendar Nice parenting, Earl.

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Pash She's trying to look pathetic on purpose.

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Maggie Mayhem You can never have too much eyeliner. Or Lash Blast.

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Maggie Mayhem Safety is sexy.

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Trudy Well, hell. Shit happens.

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Rosa Sparks Remember all that stuff I said about winning not mattering? Forget it. I wanna beat that cocky bitch.

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Bliss Cavendar Screw you and your grandmother's Chevy Celebrity!

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Brooke Cavendar Well, I know I can go overboard sometimes. But when the person that you love more than anything tells you that you suck, it...

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Razor This is a contact sport, Bliss. Eventually I'm gonna need you to make contact.

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Bliss Cavendar I gave him everything.

Brooke Cavendar No, don't say that.

Bliss Cavendar No, it's true.

[Brooke tilts her head a little to the right looking for confirmation]

Bliss Cavendar I did.

Brooke Cavendar [Looks away. Gets up, goes to the kitchen and lights up a cigarette] That's a lot to process.

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Bliss Cavendar [Kisses Oliver and then slaps] I would've called.

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Maggie Mayhem Just because you've found a new family doesn't mean you throw the old one away.

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Brooke Cavendar So enlighten me. What was that little stunt all about? Are you trying to sabotage your chances? Or was it just your biological urge to make your mother look like a jackass?

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Brooke Cavendar I'm sorry that these pageants don't live up to your high moral standards, Bliss, but there's a lot you can learn from them, no matter what you go on to be in life. You think you're being judged up there on that stage, but no one's asking you to be Miss America.

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Bliss Cavendar Seriously, out of all the places to go to in the world, who would come to Bodeen?

Pash Them. I mean, they're smart, at least they just pass through.

Birdman Go ahead and mock it. But without the Blue Bonnet factory, this town wouldn't exist.

Pash You know what, Birdman, I think I preferred you before you got promoted. You know, now you're all corporate.

Bliss Cavendar I know. I miss the old Birdman.

Pash Yeah.

Birdman Ladies, don't let the tie fool you. I'm still one of us. But y'all are gonna have to start calling me Dwayne now. It's more dignified.