Roger
Look, Anita! Puppies everywhere!
Anita
There must be a hundred of them!
Nanny
One, two, three and four. Seven, eight, nine.
Roger
Two more. Nine plus two is eleven.
Nanny
Thirty Six over here!
Roger
Thirty Six and eleven? That's forty seven.
Anita
Fourteen. Eighteen, Rog.
Roger
Uh, eh sixty five!
Nanny
Ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen!
Anita
Wait a minute, wait a minute. Six more.
Roger
Well, let's see, now. That's eighty four and fifteen plus two. A hundred and one!
Anita
A hundred and one? My, where did they all come from?
Roger
Oh ho, Pongo, you old rascal!
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Lucky
I'm tired, and I'm hungry. And my tail's froze. And my nose is froze. And my ears are froze. And my toes are froze.
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Cadpig
Old Thunderbolt's the greatest dog in the whole world.
Patch
He's even better than Dad.
Penny
No dog's better than Dad.
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Rolly
I'm hungry, Mother. I'm hungry.
Perdita
Now Rolly, you've just had your dinner.
Rolly
But I am, just the same. I'm so hungry I could eat a a whole elephant.
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Pongo
Everybody here? All fifteen?
Patch
Twice that many, Dad. Now there's 99 of us!
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Pongo
Perdy?
Perdita
That witch. That devil woman. She wants our puppies. That's all she's after.
Pongo
Don't worry, Perdy. They're on to her. Nothing's going to happen to our puppies.
Perdita
But what does she want with them? She can't possibly love them. Oh, Pongo. I was so happy at first, but now I - oh, I-I wish we weren't having any!
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Cruella
You idiots! You fools! You imbeciles!
[bursts out crying]
Jasper
Ahhh, shut up!
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Cruella De Vil
[Trying to write a check to buy the puppies]
Come now, I'm being more than generous. Blast this pen!
[Shakes it]
Cruella De Vil
Blast this wretched, wretched pen!
[Splatters ink all over Pongo and Roger]
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Danny
The humans have tried everything. Now it's up to us dogs, and the twilight bark.
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Cruella De Vil
Anita, darling!
Anita
How are you?
Cruella De Vil
Miserable, darling, as usual, perfectly wretched.
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Anita
Cruella, isn't that a new fur coat?
Cruella De Vil
My only true love, darling. I live for furs. I worship furs! After all, is there a woman in all this wretched world who doesn't?
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[first lines]
Pongo
My story begins in London, not so very long ago. And yet so much has happened since then that it seems more like an eternity.
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Cruella
Fifteen. Fifteen puppies! How marvelous! How marvelous! How perfectly ugh! Oh, the devil take it, they're mongrels. No spots! No spots at all! What a horrid little white rat!
Nanny
They're not mongrels! They'll get their spots. Just wait and see.
Anita
That's right, Cruella. They'll have their spots in a few weeks.
Cruella
Oh, well, in that case I'll take them all. The whole litter. Just name your price, dear.
Anita
I'm afraid we can't give them up. Poor Perdita, she'd be heartbroken.
Cruella
Anita, don't be ridiculous. You can't possibly afford to keep them. You can scarcely afford to feed yourselves.
Anita
Well, I'm sure we'll get along.
Cruella
[laughing]
Yes, I know! I know! Roger's.
[laughing]
Cruella
Roger's songs!
[laughs again]
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Cruella
When can the puppies leave their mother? Two weeks? Three weeks?
Roger
Never.
Cruella
What?
Roger
W-w-we're n-not s-selling t-the puppies. N-n-not a sing - a single one. Do you understand?
Cruella
Anita, is he serious? I really don't know Roger.
Anita
Well Cruella, he seems...
Cruella
Surely he must be joking!
Roger
No, no, no. I-I-I mean it. You're-you're not getting one. N-n-not one. And that's - that's final!
Cruella
Why, you horrid man! You - you - All right, keep the little beasts for all I care!
[she rips up the cheque]
Cruella
Do as you like with them! Drown them!
[she walks up to Anita]
Cruella
But I warn you, Anita, we're through. I'm through with all of you! I'll get even. Just wait. You'll be sorry! You fools! You - you idiots!
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[the pups run past Horace and Jasper while covered in soot]
Horace
Look, Jasper. Do you suppose they disguised themselves?
Jasper
[jokingly]
Say now, Horace, that's just what they did! Dogs is always paintin' 'emselves black!
[bops Horace on his head]
Jasper
You idiot!
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Patch
That old Dirty Dawson! The yellow livered old skunk!
[growls]
Patch
I'd like to tear his gizzard out.
Perdita
Why, Patch, where did you ever hear such talk? Certainly not from your mother!
[looks at Pongo suspiciously]
Pongo
[smiles guiltily at Perdy]
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Lucky
Mother! Dad! Patch pushed me in the fireplace.
Patch
Lucky pushed me first.
Lucky
Did not!
Patch
Did too!
Lucky
Did not!
Patch
Did too!
Lucky
Did not!
[Lucky sticks his tongue out at Patch]
Perdita
Please, children, don't quarrel.
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Jasper
Now, you've been gone and done it. You've cut me to the quick, lady. Why, I wouldn't stay here if you asked me to.
[Nanny tries to throw a teapot at Jasper, but it misses and breaks]
Jasper
Not even for a cup of tea.
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Seargent Tibs
Yes, sir. Righto, sir. Right away, sir!
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Roger
Oh, must be Cruella, your dearly devoted old schoolmate. Cruella De Vil. That's it!
[sings]
Roger
Cruella De Vil / Cruella De Vil / If she doesn't scare you, no evil thing will.
Anita
Oh, Roger!
Roger
To see her is to take a sudden chill / Cruella, Cruella / She's like a spider waiting for the kill.
Anita
Roger, she'll hear you.
Roger
Look out for Cruella De Vil.
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Cruella De Vil
I've got no time to argue. I tell you, it's got to be done tonight!
[Turns off television set]
Cruella De Vil
Do you understand? Tonight!
Horace
But they ain't big enough.
Jasper
You couldn't get half a dozen coats out of the whole kaboodle.
Seargent Tibs
[whispering]
Coats? Dog skin coats?
Cruella De Vil
Then we'll settle for half a dozen!
Jasper
[Jasper coughs]
Cruella De Vil
We can't wait! The police are everywhere. I want the job done tonight!
Horace
How're we gonna do it?
Cruella De Vil
Any way you like. Poison them. Drown them. Bash them in the head. You got any chloroform?
Jasper
Not a drop.
Horace
And no ether, either.
Jasper
[Hits Horace over the head with bottle]
Jasper
Either!
Cruella De Vil
I don't care how you kill the little beasts, but do it, and do it now!
Jasper
Aw, please, miss. Have pity, will you? Can't we see the rest of the show first?
Horace
We want to see "What's My Crime?"
[Cruella takes Jasper's bottle causing him to cough and throws it into the fireplace, where it explodes; she slaps both of them in the face]
Cruella De Vil
Now listen, you idiots! I'll be back first thing in the morning. And the job better be done or I'll I'll I'll call the police! Do you understand?
Seargent Tibs
[She slams the door behind her; a piece of plaster falls off the ceiling and on Horace's head]
Horace
I think she means it, Jasper.
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Colonel
[decoding the Twilight Bark]
One long howl... two short... one yip and a woof.
Seargent Tibs
Two yips, sir.
Captain
What's the word, Colonel?
Colonel
It's from London.
Seargent Tibs
Then it must be important!
Colonel
Yes, yes, well I'll get the rest of it.
[barks, listens]
Colonel
Sounds like a number! Three fives are thirteen...
Seargent Tibs
Uh, that's fifteen, sir.
Colonel
Fifteen, of course fifteen!
[listens again]
Colonel
Yes, dot, spot, spotted puddings... poodles... no, puddles.
Captain
[confused]
Puddles, sir?
Colonel
Fifteen spotted puddles stolen? Oh, balderdash!
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Pongo
[Pongo sees Perdita for the first time]
Well, now that's a bit more like it! The most beautiful creature on four legs! Oh, now, if only the girl...
[looks at Anita]
Pongo
Well! She's very lovely too. It was almost too good to be true. I'd never find another pair like that, not if I looked for a hundred years.
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Cruella De Vil
Well, any sign of them?
Jasper
Not so much as a blooming footprint. And we've been up and down every blicking road in the county.
Horace
We're froze stiff. We're giving up.
Cruella De Vil
Oh, no, you don't! We'll find the little mongrels if it takes till next Christmas. Now get going! And watch your driving, you imbeciles! Do you wanna get nabbed by the police?
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Horace
I don't like it, Jasper. One more pinch, and they'll throw the keys away.
Jasper
Oh, come off it, Horace. We're getting plenty of bootle.
Horace
Yes, but I've been thinking.
Jasper
You've been thinking? Now look here, Horace! I warned you about thinking! I've got the nog for this job, so let's get on with it!
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Pongo
[Pongo and Perdita have just reunited with their puppies]
Lucky! Patch! Pepper! Freckles! And Rolly, you little rascal!
Rolly
Did you bring me anything to eat?
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Cruella De Vil
[on the phone with Jasper]
Jasper! Jasper, you idiot! How dare you call here!
Jasper
But, we don't want no more of this here! We want our bootle! We'll settle for half!
Cruella De Vil
Not one shilling until the job is done! Understand?
Horace
Jasper! Jasper!
[shows him the newspaper that it says "15 puppies stolen" in it]
Jasper
[to Cruella]
But it's here in the blinkin' papers! Pictures and all!
Cruella De Vil
Hang the papers! It'll be forgotten tomorrow!
Horace
I don't like it, Jasper. I...
Jasper
[to Horace]
Ah, shut up, you idiot!
Cruella De Vil
[shouts]
What?
Jasper
[to Cruella]
Whoa! Oh, no! Not you, Miss! I mean Horace, here!
Cruella De Vil
Why, you imbecile!
[slams down the phone]
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Pongo
As far as I could see, the old notion that a bachelor's life was so glamorous and carefree was all nonsense. It was downright dull.
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Roger
At first you think Cruella is a devil / But after time has worn away the shock / You come to realize / You've seen her kind of eyes / Watching you from underneath a rock.
Anita
You're no help.
Roger
This vampire bat, this inhuman beast / She ought to be locked up and never released / The world was such a wholesome place until / Cruella, Cruella De Vil.
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Jasper
Hey look, Horace! Watch me pot His Lordship smack on the conk!
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Pongo
Perdy, I've got an idea!
[rolls around in soot]
Perdita
Pongo, what on earth?
Pongo
Look! I'm a Labrador! We'll all roll in the soot! We'll all be Labradors!
Labrador
Say! That is an idea!
Pongo
Come on, kids! Roll in the soot!
Penny
You mean you want us to get dirty?
Pepper
Did you hear that, Freckles? Dad wants us to get dirty.
Cadpig
Mother, should we?
Perdita
[sighs] Do as your father says.
Pepper
This'll be fun!
Cadpig
I always wanted to get good and dirty!
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Rolly
I'm not sleepy. I'm hungry.
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Nanny
The puppies are here! Oh, the puppies are here!
[laughs]
Roger
How many?
Nanny
Eight.
Roger
Eight?
[Pongo barks]
Roger
By George, Pongo! Eight puppies!
Nanny
Ten.
Anita
Eleven!
Nanny
Eleven!
Roger
Eleven? Eleven puppies! Pongo boy!
Nanny
Wait a minute now. Wait a minute... Thirteen! No, no, no, fourteen. Oh, fifteen!
Roger
Fifteen?
Nanny
[chuckles to Pongo]
And the mother is doing fine, love.
[Pongo walks around like he's drunk]
Roger
Fifteen puppies? Why, Pongo boy, that's marvelous! It's fabulous! Why, you old rascal!
Nanny
[enters with a puppy under a blanket]
Fourteen. Just fourteen. We lost one.
[hands it to Roger]
Nanny
Oh, the poor little thing.
[the room goes silent]
Roger
Oh, Pongo boy... it's just one of those things. And yet... and yet I wonder...
[Roger starts rubbing the puppy for a little while, until suddenly, it starts to move]
Roger
Look, Pongo!
[the puppy is alive]
Roger
Anita! Nanny! Fifteen! We still have fifteen!
Anita
Oh, Roger, he's all right! Thank heaven.
Roger
See? He's just as good as new!
Anita
Can you imagine, Rog? Fifteen puppies!
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Pongo
What? 99? Where did they all come from?
Perdita
What on earth would she want with so many?
Spotty
She's gonna make coats out of us!
Perdita
She couldn't!
Seargent Tibs
That's right. Dog skinned coats.
Colonel
Oh, dog skinned coats. Oh, come now, Tibs!
Seargent Tibs
But it's true, sir.
Patch
Horace and Jasper are going to pop us off and skin us!
Perdita
She's a devil! A witch! Oh, what'll we do?
Pongo
We have to get back to London somehow.
Patch
What about the others? What'll they do?
Pongo
Perdy, we'll take them home with us. All of them.
[the puppies start wagging their tails]
Pongo
Our pets would never turn them out.
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Anita
Oh, Roger, you are an idiot.
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[the Colonel and Seargent Tibs are still waiting for Pongo and Perdita]
Captain
Any news, Colonel?
Colonel
No. Not a blasted thing. They're lost or captured, or something or other. Who knows what?
Seargent Tibs
Colonel, here comes a car!
Colonel
Oh, come now, Tibs! Don't be ridiculous! They wouldn't be driving.
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Danny
[echoing]
Good luck, Pongo. If you lose your way, contact the barking chain. They'll be standing by!
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Truck Driver
[sees Cruella driving like a maniac]
Hey, lady! What in thunder are you tryin' to do? Crazy woman driver!
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[whistles]
Roger
Do you like my new song?
Anita
Ta tum ti ta tum. Such clever lyrics.
Roger
Melody first, my dear, and then the lyrics. Hmmm?
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Lucy
Towser, what's going on? What is it? What's all the gossip?
Towser
'Taint no gossip, Lucy. It be all the way from London.
Lucy
You don't say!
Towser
Fifteen puppies stolen!
Lucy
There's no puppies around here, not since Nellie's last litter and they all are grown.
Towser
Well, then we'd best send the word along. It be up to me to reach the Colonel! He be the only one in barking range.
Lucy
You'll never reach him at this hour.
Towser
Well I can try! I'll bark all night if I have to.
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[Cruella is reading the newspapers headlining the capture of the Dalmatian puppies]
Cruella De Vil
[reads one headline]
"Dognapping!" Tsk, tsk, tsk. Can you imagine such a thing?
[reads another headline]
Cruella De Vil
"Fifteen Puppies Stolen". They are darling little things.
[she looks at the photos in the papers of the Radcliffs and their Dalmatians]
Cruella De Vil
Anita and her...
[laughs]
Cruella De Vil
and her bashful Beethoven, pipe and all!
[laughs]
Cruella De Vil
Oh, Roger, you are a fool!
[laughs]
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[the dalmatians are hiding from Jasper and Horace under a bridge across a frozen creek]
Jasper
Aw, they gotta be around here somewhere.
Horace
Jasper, I've been thinking.
Jasper
Now, Horace!
Horace
But what if they went down the froze-up creek so as not to leave their tracks?
Jasper
Oh, Horace, you idiot! Dogs ain't that smart.
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Pongo
It was plain to see that my old pet needed someone, but if it were left up to Roger, we'd be bachelors forever. He was married to his work writing songs. Songs about romance of all things. Something he knew absolutely nothing about.
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Nanny
What's the matter with you two? You got cloth ears? I said you're not coming in here!
Jasper
Ho, ho, ho! She's a regular old totter, ain't she, Horace? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
Nanny
Don't you dare go up there, you big long-legged lumox!
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Horace
We're from the Gas Company.
Jasper
[elbows him]
'Lectric! 'Lectric!
Horace
Uh, Electric Company.
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Pongo
Perdy, I'm afraid it's all up to us.
Perdita
Oh, Pongo. Isn't there any hope?
Pongo
Well, yes. There's the twilight bark.
Perdita
The twilight bark? But dear, that's only a gossip chain.
Pongo
Darling, it's the very fastest way to send news. And if our puppies are anywhere in the city, the London dogs will know. Now we'll send the word tonight when our pets take us for a walk in the park.
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Jasper
I ain't gonna hurt ya.
Horace
But I thought we was gonna pop 'em off.
Jasper
Shh, shut up!
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Colonel
They say the ol' place is haunted or bewitched or some such fiddle faddle.
Seargent Tibs
Fiddle faddle and rot, sir.
Colonel
Just the same, Sergeant, use extreme caution. No telling what sort of hocus pocus you might run into.
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Roger
We'll buy a big place in the country. We'll have a plantation. A Dalmatian plantation!
Anita
Oh, Roger, that's truly an inspiration.
Nanny
It'll be a sensation!
[laughs]
Roger
We'll have a Dalmatian plantation. A Dalmatian plantation, I say.
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Horace
[Jasper is drinking]
Hey, Jasper! Come on now, give us a swig. Just a short one?
Jasper
Now Horace, this hogwash ain't fit for a fancy gent like yourself. Besides, you'd get crumbs in it, ya cabbage head!
Horace
[not noticing Rolly stealing the meat out of his sandwich]
All right! Guzzle the whole works, and I hope it gives ya collywobbles, that's what!
[He takes a bite out of the now empty sandwich, looks puzzled and holds it open to Jasper]
Horace
'Ere Jasper, did you...?
[Jasper nonchalantly taps his cigar ash over it]
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Anita
Roger, I admit she's eccentric, but she isn't a thief!
Roger
Well, she's still #1 suspect in my book!
Anita
Well, she's been investigated by Scotland Yard. What more do you want?
Roger
Oh, I don't know, darling. I don't know.
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Anita
[as the soot covered Dalmatians barge into the Radcliffe house]
Roger, what on earth?
Roger
Why, they're labradors!
Nanny
No, no! They're all covered in soot. Look, here's Lucky!
Anita
[wipes off Perdita's face]
And Perdy! Oh, my darling!
Nanny
[dusts off the puppies one by one]
And Patch, And Rolly, and Penny, and Freckles!
[laughs]
Nanny
They're all here, the little deadrs!
Roger
It's a miracle!
Anita
Oh Rog, what a wonderful Christmas present!
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Pongo
Thank you, Sergeant, Colonel, Captain.
Perdita
Bless you all.
Pongo
How can we ever repay you?
Colonel
Oh, nothing at all. All in the line of duty.
Seargent Tibs
That's right, sir. Routine.
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Pongo
[on Roger]
Oh, he's intelligent enough, as humans go; and I think you could say Roger is a rather handsome animal in his way...
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Pongo
Perdita, darling, are you all right?
Perdita
Oh, of course, dear. After all, dogs were having puppies long before our time.
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Jasper
[after locking Nanny in the attic]
Hey! Horace, me lad! I've got a sneaky suspicion we're not welcome here!
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Jasper
[as Pongo's pulling his pants down]
Hey, Horace! They're fighting dirty!
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Pongo
Perdy? We need to get these little nippers off to bed if we're going for a w-a-l-k.
Freckles
We wanna go too, Mother.
Wizzer
Can we, mother? Can we?
Salter
We never get to go.
Perdita
Come along, children. Bedtime.
Patch
But we're not a...
[yawns]
Patch
... bit sleepy. We wanna go for a walk in the park.
Wizzer
Dad, can we?
Pongo
Better do what your mother says.
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[Jasper picks up Tibs thinking that it's a bottle. Tibs screeches]
Jasper
Hey look, Horace! We have a visitor, it's a tabby cat!
[Tibbs run over to the piano and slams the lid down, with Horace's head inside the piano]
Jasper
How about we make him a tabby cat stew!
[Tibs runs towards the wall]
Jasper
[sneaking up on Tibs holding a bottle]
Or a cat casserole...
[chuckles]
Jasper
[throws bottle at Tibs]
... a la Mode!
[Tibs escapes the room through a hole in the wall by the door as the bottle smashes against the wall]
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Jasper
I'll skin every one of them little spotted hyenas, if it's the last thing I do.
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Cruella De Vil
Well what have we here?
[looking at the snow]
Cruella De Vil
So they thought they could outwit Cruella?
[Honking car horn]
Cruella De Vil
Jasper! Horace! Here's their tracks heading straight for the village!
Jasper
Blimey! It's them, all right.
Cruella De Vil
Work your way south on the side roads. I'll take the main road.
[Driving off]
Cruella De Vil
See you in Dinsford!
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Cruella
[over the phone]
Oh, Anita, what a dreadful day. I just saw the papers. I couldn't believe it.
Anita
Yes, Cruella, it was quite a shock.
Roger
What does she want? Is she calling to confess?
Anita
Roger, please!
Roger
Oh, she's a sly one, she is!
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Anita
Oh, I'd like a nice fur, but there are other nice things...
Cruella De Vil
Sweet, simple Anita! I know, I know! This horrid little house is your dream castle! And poor Roger is your bold and fearless Sir Galahad!
[laughs]
Anita
Oh, Cruella...
Cruella De Vil
And then of course, you have your little spotted friends...
[She peers at a picture of Pongo and Perdita and blows smoke around it]
Cruella De Vil
Yes I must say, such perfectly beautiful coats...
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Quizmaster
Now, Mr. Fauncwater, if the panel fails to guess your unusual crime in ten questions, you will win a two-week vacation at a fashionable seaside resort, all expenses paid. That is, of course, after you've paid your debt to society.
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Pongo
That's the stuff! The blacker the better!
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TV Announcer
Don't miss next week's exciting episode. Who will triumph?
Patch
Ol' Thunder always wins!
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Anita
Oh, it'll be at least three weeks. No rushing these things, you know.
Cruella De Vil
[chuckles]
Anita, you're such a wit.
[calls Pongo]
Cruella De Vil
Here dog, here. Here, dog.
Pongo
[Growls at Cruella angrily]
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Horace
[yanks the steering wheel off in a panic]
Jasper!
Jasper
[the Baduns' van careens out of control]
Horace!
[the Baduns' van collides with Cruella's half-wrecked car with a big crash as they land themselves into a snowy ravine while the moving van drives away]
Cruella De Vil
You idiots! You... you fools! *sobs* Ah, you imbeciles!
Jasper
Ah, shaddap.
[Cruella sobs in defeat]
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Freckles
Missed him! Missed him by a mile!
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Pongo
It was a beautiful spring day. Tedious time of the year for bachelors.
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Jasper
There's a new act just been passed in parliament. Comes under the heading of "Defence of the Realm Act", it's article 4, section 29, it's very important, you see, it's the law, and it's for your safety, ma'am.
Nanny
Well, I don't care what Parliament realm, or whatever it is, says. You're not coming in here, not with the mister and missus gone.
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Cruella
[phone rings]
Hello?
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[as Tibs and the puppies are chased by the Baduns]
Colonel
Sergeant? I say, sergeant!
Seargent Tibs
[stops and salutes]
Sorry sir, no time to explain, busy sir!
[resumes running]
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Jasper
The little twerps! Giving us the slip! And after we took so much care of them! That's gratitude for ya!
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Perdita
I don't know what we'd have done if...
Queenie
Oh, we're very honoured to be of service.
Princess
We're only sorry we can't do more.
[Pongo and Perdita are now fast asleep]
Duchess
Anyone who would think of hurting these dear, little puppies...
Queenie
Shh! Duchess!
[the puppies are now fast asleep with their parents, as a few of them try to make room for themselves]
Duchess
They're so dear.
Princess
I wish they could stay with us for always.
Queenie
Princess, shh. Quiet, everyone. Let them sleep, the poor things. They're so exhausted, and they still have such a long way to go.
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Princess
Just look, Queenie. Have you ever seen so many puppies?
Queenie
Aren't they adorable!
Duchess
Perfectly darling.
Princess
The poor, little dears. They're completely worn out and half frozen!
[Pongo puts Lucky down by Perdita's feet]
Perdita
They all here, Pongo?
Pongo
Yes, dear. All 99 accounted for.
Queenie
The famous Pongos. We were so worried about you.
Collie
Been trying to reach you for hours. Afraid you'd been captured.
Queenie
How did you make it all this way? And in such dreadful weather?
Duchess
And with all those little ones.
Rolly
I'm hungry, Mother. I'm hungry.
Cadpig
I'm hungry, too.
Freckles
Mother, we're hungry.
Puppies
[chattering] We're all hungry.
Perdita
I'm sorry, children.
[Countess whispers something into Princess' ear]
Princess
Do they like warm milk? It's fresh.
Perdita
Oh.
Rolly
Where, mother? Where is it?
Freckles
Where is the milk?
Queenie
[tenderly] Come and get it, kids. It's on the house.
Perdita
This way, children. Around this way.
[Perdita leads the kids behind the dairy cows to let the kids feed on their mill]
Perdita
Now, don't crowd. You'll have to take turns.
[Rolly tries pushing through his siblings to suck on one of the cows' udders]
Perdita
Rolly, wait your turn, dear.
[Rolly gets on a stool to reach the udder but trips over]
Duchess
Don't worry, kids. There's plenty for all."
[She feels her udder being touched by one of the puppies]
Duchess
"Ooh! The little darlings.
[while the puppies feed on the cows' milk, Pongo sits aside as the Collie brings him a discarded sandwich]
Collie
Pongo, a few scraps I saved for you and the missus.
Pongo
Oh, thank you.
Collie
It's not much, but it might hold you as far as Dinsford.
Pongo
Huh? Dinsford?
Collie
Yes, there's a Labrador there. His pet is a grocer.
Pongo
[yawning] "Oh, I... I'm terribly sorry.
Collie
Oh, quite all right. Quite all right. Now, get some rest and don't worry. I'll be standing watch.
[the Collie goes outside to keep an eye out for Cruella and the Baduns. Pongo lays down to rest]
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Man
Aw shut up! Quiet! WILL YOU BE QUIET!
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Captain
[neighing lowly]
Hmm-hmm-hmm. Hmm... sounds like old Towser. It's an alert. Sergeant!
[He speaks louder to wake up Sergeant Tibbs, a tabby cat sleeping on his back]
Captain
Sergeant Tibbs! I SAY, SERGEANT!
[He neighs loudly to wake up Tibbs]
Seargent Tibs
[screeches, then promptly salutes]
Who? What? Oh, yes, Captain!
Captain
Barking signal. It's an alert. Report to the Colonel at once.
Seargent Tibs
[respectfully]
Yes, sir. Righto, sir. Right away, sir!
[Tibbs hops off Captain's back and scurries along the barn rafters to find Colonel. He reaches an empty barn stall with plenty of hay scattered on the floor and looks for Colonel]
Seargent Tibs
Colonel? I say, Colonel! Colonel, sir? Colonel?
[Tibbs yelps as he is lifted on his superior's head buried inside the hay]
Seargent Tibs
Colonel?
Colonel
[waking up]
What? What? Who goes there?
Seargent Tibs
Sergeant Tibbs reporting, sir.
Colonel
Tibbs? Tibbs? Oh, yes, Sergeant Tibbs!
Seargent Tibs
Colonel, sir...
Colonel
Now, look here, Tibbs. What's the idea of barging in at this hour of the night?
Seargent Tibs
But, Colonel...
Colonel
Hold on, Sergeant. You hear that? Sounds like an alert.
Seargent Tibs
[sighs]
Yes, Colonel.
Colonel
Well, we'd better look into it. Come along, on the double!
Seargent Tibs
Yes, sir. Righto, sir.
[Tibbs follows Colonel to the stall next to Captain's stall, just as Captain himself hears the last of the message]
Captain
It's old Towser down at Withermarsh, sir.
Colonel
By Jove, yes! So it is. Well, I'll see what he wants. Ahem!
[barking]
Colonel
Woof, woof, woof! Woof, woof, woof!
[Back on the hill a good distance away from the farm, Towser receives the response from Colonel with Lucy holding up his left ear]
Towser
It'd be the Colonel. The old boy himself!
[chuckles]
Towser
He wants the message.
Lucy
You'd better make it loud and clear or he'll never get it.
[Towser then barks the message about the fifteen stolen puppies]
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Horace
Jasper!
Jasper
There ain't nothing to it! I'll give them a bit of a nudge... *laugh*... AND SEND THEM IN THE DIRT! *laugh*
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Truck Driver
[sees Cruella ramming his van]
Hey, lady! What in thunder are you trying to do?
[Cruella moves in a different direction]
Truck Driver
Crazy woman driver.
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Nanny
Be off with you, you big... you big weasel!
Jasper
Now you've gone and done it. You've cut me to the quick, lady. Why, I wouldn't stay here if you asked me to.
[Nanny throws a teapot at him, but he dodges and it smashes against the door]
Jasper
Not even for a cup of tea.
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Jasper
There they go, Horace, me lad: Out for their evening constitutional.
[He peers into the rear view mirror and sees them turn the corner]
Jasper
Ah, a lovely pair of turtledoves. Around the Johnny corner and off to the park.
Horace
[cynical]
Yeah, I don't like it, Jasper. One more pinch, and they'll throw the keys away.
Jasper
Oh, come off it, Horace. We're getting plenty of boodle.
Horace
Yes, but... I've been thinking...
Jasper
You've been thinking?
[aggressively grabs Horace]
Jasper
Now, look here, Horace: I warned you about thinking. I've got the knob for this job, so let's get on with it.
[He starts up their truck and drives it up to the doorsteps of Roger and Anita's flat. The truck makes sputtering noises along the way and stops with a squeak. Jasper and Horace emerge from the truck and walk up the doorsteps, as Horace as a handbag in his hands]
Jasper
Ah, nobody home but the little ol' cook. Now, you just leave her to ol' Jasper. He can handle her real diplomatic-like.
Horace
[nervously]
Yeah, but I still don't like it.
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Pongo
Perdy, I've got an idea.
Perdita
Pongo, what on earth...
Pongo
Look I'm a Labrador! We'll all roll in the soot. We'll be Labradors.
Labrador
Say, that is an idea!
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Priest
Will though love her, comfort her, honor her, keep her in sickness and in health, and keep it only to her for as long as thee both shall live?
Roger
I will.
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