Demolition Man 1993 - Movie Quotes

T.V. Reporter [to John Spartan] How can you justify destroying a $7 million dollar mini mall to rescue a girl whose ransom was only $25,000 dollars?

Little Girl FUCK YOU, LADY!

John Spartan Ha! Good answer!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley I have, in fact, perused some newsreels in the Schwarzenegger Library, and the time that you took that car...

John Spartan Hold it. The Schwarzenegger Library?

Lenina Huxley Yes. The Schwarzenegger Presidential Library. Wasn't he an actor when you...?

John Spartan Stop! He was President?

Lenina Huxley Yes! Even though he was not born in this country, his popularity at the time caused the 61st Amendment which states...

John Spartan I don't wanna know. President...

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan [to machine on wall after finding out that they no longer use toilet paper] Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass.

Moral Statute Machine John Spartan, you are fined five credits for repeated violations of the verbal morality statute.

John Spartan [grabbing the tickets] So much for the seashells. See you in a few minutes.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Erwin We're police officers! We're not trained to handle this kind of violence!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[last lines]

John Spartan But there's just one thing I wanna know...

Lenina Huxley Hm?

John Spartan How's that damn three seashell thing work?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley He's finally matched his meet. You really licked his ass.

John Spartan That's *met* his match and kicked... *kicked* his ass...

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Bad aim, Blondie!

Simon Phoenix Spartan? John Spartan? Aw shit, they let anybody into this century! What the hell you doing here?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan [whispering to Lenina] Look, I don't know if you guys know it, but uh... you're out of toilet paper.

Alfredo Garcia [confused] Did... did you say toilet *paper*?

Lenina Huxley Um... they used handfuls of wadded paper back in the 20th...

[Lenina, Alfredo, and Erwin all laugh]

John Spartan I'm happy that you're happy, but the place where you're supposed to have the toilet paper, you've got this little shelf with three seashells on it.

Erwin He doesn't know how to use the three seashells!

[Erwin continues to laugh, then calms down]

Erwin I can see how that could be confusing.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Is it cold in here, or is it just me?

Simon Phoenix Good memory.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley [Spartan encounters a burger grill in the underground world] Just don't ask them where the meat comes from.

John Spartan Huxley, what's that supposed to mean?

Lenina Huxley Do you see any cows around here, detective?

John Spartan Que es este carne?

[What is this meat?]

Hamburger Stand Scrap Este carne es de rata.

[This meat is from rats]

John Spartan Rat? This is a rat burger?

[vendor nods]

John Spartan Not bad! Matter of fact this is the best burger I've had in years!

Hamburger Stand Scrap Gracias, Senor.

John Spartan Prego. See ya later.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[the voice-activated car that Spartan is riding in is malfunctioning]

John Spartan Brake! Brake! Brake now, you Mickey Mouse-piece of shit!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[after futuristic, contact-free "sex"]

John Spartan Look, Huxley, why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?

Lenina Huxley [stands up, shocked] Eeewww, disgusting! You mean... *fluid transfer*?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Hey Luke Skywalker, use the force.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[cops are singing along with "golden oldies": radio jingles]

John Spartan Somebody put me back in the fridge.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Taco Bell Patron What would you say if I called you a brutish fossil, symbolic of a decayed era gratefully forgotten?

John Spartan I don't know... thanks?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Boggle Guard Mellow greetings. What seems to be your boggle?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley The exchange of bodily fluids, do you know what that leads to?

John Spartan Yeah, I do! Kids, smoking, a desire to raid the fridge.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley What you're telling me to do is violate a direct order. I'm supposed to take you back to the Cryo Prison.

John Spartan Listen, Huxley. I just know okay. I'm gonna find Phoenix and I'm gonna put him on ice or that's where *I'm* gonna be. After that, I'm gonna turn all of my attention to that fuckin' Cacteau.

Lenina Huxley Enhance your calm, John Spartan.

John Spartan Look, I'm tired of enhancing my calm.

Alfredo Garcia [Seeing Spartan opening the pod to the depths of wasteland] Wait, you're opening the pod to the depths of wasteland?

John Spartan The real reason why your citywide search didn't work is because Phoenix was in an area that A: You can't monitor. B: You're afraid to go down and C: You don't give a shit about. Now, I'm going to find Phoenix and I'm gonna put him in a hurt locker. So, are you coming with me, or are you gonna arrest me?

Lenina Huxley Okay. Let's go blow this guy.

John Spartan [Annoyed] Away. Blow this guy *away*?

Lenina Huxley Whatever.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley I was wondering if you would like to have sex?

John Spartan [surprised] Here? With you? Now?

Lenina Huxley [nervously, nodding] Mm-hmm.

John Spartan Oh yeah.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Squad Leader Simon Phoenix! Lie down with your hands behind your back.

Simon Phoenix What's this? Six of you. Such nice, tidy uniforms. Oh I'm so scared!

[the Police Officers look at each other]

Simon Phoenix What you guys don't have sarcasm anymore?

[Police Officer talks to his automated assistant]

Squad Leader Maniac has responded with a scornful remark.

automated assistant Approach, and repeat ultimatum in an even firmer tone of voice. Add the words, "or else".

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Edgar Friendly You got ball balls, cop, coming down here after the show you put on.

Lenina Huxley We're looking for a murder-death-killer. Can you help, or just bully us with your primitive weapons?

[Friendly then raises his twin barrelled pistol and fires it to show it's not primitive]

Lenina Huxley Oh, maybe they're not so primitive.

Edgar Friendly So, you think you're taking me in, huh? Guess what, not happening. You tell Cocteau he can kiss my ass. Yeah, that's right, you tell Cocteau it's gonna take an army of assholes to get rid of me 'cause I don't give a shit, I've got nothing to lose.

John Spartan I don't wanna rain on your parade, pal. But, I don't know who the hell you are, let alone wanna take you anywhere. So stay here, be well and Cocteau's an asshole!

[In anger, he slaps a scrap's weapon to the side]

Wasteland Scrap Let's stake them and dump them up top, they're only down here to spy on us.

John Spartan Wait a minute, you're the guy outside Taco Bell.

Edgar Friendly Yeah. What do you want?

John Spartan I guess you weren't part of the Cocteau Plan.

Edgar Friendly Greed, deception, abuse of power? That's no plan.

John Spartan And that's why everybody's down here?

Edgar Friendly You got that right. See, according to Cocteau's plan, I'm the enemy. Cause I like to think, I like to read. I'm into freedom of speech and freedom of choice. I'm the kind if guy who wants to sit in a greasy spoon and think, "Gee, should I have the T-bone steak or the jumbo rack of barbecued ribs with the side order of gravy fries?" I want high cholesterol. I want to eat bacon, butter and buckets of cheese, okay? I want to smoke a Cuban cigar the size of Cincinnati in a non-smoking section. I wanna run through the streets naked with green Jello all over my body reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly might feel the need to. Okay, pal? I've seen the future, you know what it is? It's a 47-year-old virgin sittin' around in his beige pajamas, drinking a banana-broccoli shake singing "I'm an Oscar-Meyer Wiener". You wanna live on top, you gotta live Cocteau's way. What he wants, when he wants, how he wants. Your other choice: come down here, maybe starve to death.

John Spartan All right, then why don't you take charge and lead these people out of here?

Edgar Friendly I'm no leader. I do what I have to do. Sometimes, people come with me. All I want to do is bury Cocteau up to his neck in shit and let him think happy-happy thoughts forever.

John Spartan Then I got bad news: I think he wants to kill you.

[Freindly gives him a blank look]

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley Chief, you can take this job, and you can shovel it.

John Spartan Take this job... and shovel it.

Lenina Huxley Yeah?

John Spartan Close enough.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan You're gonna regret this the rest of your life... both seconds of it.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Dr. Cocteau Be well!

John Spartan Be fucked.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix Simon says, "Die."

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley No, John Spartan, you do not accuse the savior of our city of being in league with a multi-murder-death-killer like Simon Phoenix! It's... rude!

John Spartan I'll be subtle. I'm good at subtle.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[Simon goes to a computer terminal and is surprised to find his fingers flying across the keys with ease]

Simon Phoenix Damn, I'm possessed! Wonder if I can play the accordion too...

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley Ah, smoking is not good for you, and it's been deemed that anything not good for you is bad; hence, illegal. Alcohol, caffeine, contact sports, meat...

John Spartan Are you shitting me?

Moral Statute Machine John Spartan, you are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.

John Spartan What the hell is that?

Moral Statute Machine John Spartan, you are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.

Lenina Huxley Bad language, chocolate, gasoline, uneducational toys and anything spicy. Abortion is also illegal, but then again so is pregnancy if you don't have a licence.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley [shoots a CyroCon about to knife Spartan] That man has died by my hands.

John Spartan It was him or us, Huxley.

Lenina Huxley Well yeah, there is that.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Zachary Lamb - Aged Simon Phoenix is an old fashioned criminal. We need an old fashioned cop.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Dr. Cocteau [to Simon Phoenix] I hadn't counted on this, but I must say, you worked out beautifully. People are terrified of you.

Simon Phoenix What's new? People have always been terrified of me.

Dr. Cocteau Yes, but this time, the're really intimidated. Now I'll have carte blanche to create the perfect society. My society. San Angeles will be a beacon of order

[Simon Phoenix is trying to shoot on Dr. Cocteau, but he is unable to pull the trigger]

Dr. Cocteau with the purity of an ant colony. And the beauty of a flawless pearl.

Simon Phoenix Look, you can't take away people's right to be assholes.

Dr. Cocteau Hmm?

Simon Phoenix That's what you remind me of an evil Mr. Rodgers.

[Simon Phoenix drops the gun to his team-mate]

Simon Phoenix Will you please kill him? He's pissing me off.

[the team-mate shoots Dr. Cocteau to death with multiple shots]

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley Thank you for rendering me unconscious.

John Spartan Huxley, I did it for your own good.

Lenina Huxley We're supposed to be a team.

John Spartan We are.

[grabs Huxley, dips, and tongue-kisses her]

Lenina Huxley [shocked, but impressed] Oh, my. Are all bodily fluid transfers like this?

John Spartan Better.

Lenina Huxley Better? Oh, my.

[Huxley kisses Spartan]

John Spartan I think I'm gonna like the future.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix Simon says, "Bleed."

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley Looks like there's a new shepherd in town.

[Spartan gives her an exasperated look]

John Spartan That's sheriff.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Automated Announcer The Armory exhibit is now sealed. All museum patrons still occupying the facility should remain calm. Help is imminent.

[the sealed Armory door is blown apart by a canon]

Simon Phoenix The museum is no longer sealed, is it? Ha-ha! What can I say, I'm a blast from the past!

John Spartan You should've stayed there.

Simon Phoenix Oh boy, that voice sounds familiar. Who is that?

[opens fire]

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Chief George Earle You have apprehended the villain responsible for the murder of our beloved Dr. Raymond Cocteau?

John Spartan Well, I wouldn't exactly say apprehended. Let's just say he's history. And the Cryo-prison? That's history, too.

[Chief Earle looks upon the damaged cryo-prison in disbelief]

Chief George Earle [confused; takes off his glasses] What will we do? How will we live?

Edgar Friendly I tell you what we're do. We're all gonna go out drinking, get shit-faced, and paint the town, literally. I mean graffiti, slogans. It'll be a blast.

John Spartan Whoa, Whoa. I'll tell you what gonna do:

John Spartan [to Chief Earle] Why don't you get a little dirty?

John Spartan [to Edgar] You a lot clean.

John Spartan And somewhere in the middle... I don't know. You'll figure it out.

Alfredo Garcia Fuckin' A!

John Spartan [impressed] Well put.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Troubled Guy I don't know... lately I just don't feel like there's anything special about me.

Booth You are an incredibly sensitive man, who inspires joy-joy feelings in all those around you.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Booth Gun. Noun. Portable firearm. This device was widely utilized in the urban wars of the late twentieth century. Referred to as a pistol, a piece...

Simon Phoenix Look I don't need a history lesson! C'mon, HAL, where are the god damn guns?

Moral Statute Machine You are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.

Simon Phoenix What? Fuck you!

Moral Statute Machine Your repeated violation of the Verbal Morality Statute has caused me to notify the San Angeles Police Department. Please remain where you are for your reprimand.

Simon Phoenix Yeah, right.

[police sirens approach]

Simon Phoenix Fuckers are fast too.

Moral Statute Machine You are fined one credit for a violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley [sotto voce] Sanctimonious asshole.

Machine on wall Lenina Huxley, you are fined one-half credit for a sotto voce violation of the Verbal Morality Statute.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[John Spartan is about to bungee jump from a helicopter]

John Spartan Send a maniac to catch one.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix Wait a minute, this is the future. Where are all the phaser guns?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Huxley, look, this isn't the Wild West! The Wild West wasn't even the Wild West! Hurting people's not a good thing! Sometimes it is,

[turns to Cocteau]

John Spartan but not when it's a bunch of people looking for something to eat!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Look, I'm sorry I yelled at you back there.

Lenina Huxley No need to make a de-hurtful retraction. I've just assimilated too much contraband. I fleshed you out as some blow-up-the-bad-guy-with-a-happy-grin-he-man type, but now I realize that you're the moody-troubled-past-gunslinger-who-only-draws-when-he-must type.

John Spartan Huxley, stop.

Lenina Huxley What?

John Spartan I'm not any of that. I just do my job and things get...

Lenina Huxley Get demolished.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix [Opens a manhole] Shit! I love that smell. Reminds me of biscuits 'n gravy.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[John Spartan landed on the police car stolen by Simon Phoenix]

Simon Phoenix No free rides!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix [checking the charge status of his futuristic plasma rifle] C'mon you space-age piece of shit!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[after Spartan crashes in a police car]

Lenina Huxley Look at you, you're a shambles!

John Spartan Don't worry, I can fix it. All I need is a needle and thread.

[pause]

John Spartan I really didn't say that, did I? Damn!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix [to Cocteau] That's who you remind me of: an evil Mr. Rogers!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Captain Healy Dammit, Spartan. I'm sick and tired of this "Demolition Man" shit! You're not supposed to come down here, you're not supposed to apprehend Simon Phoenix single-handedly, and you're not supposed to blow anything up!

John Spartan It wasn't me this time, he dumped the gas and had the placed rigged to blow.

Captain Healy Yeah right, and you had nothing to do with it. I know you've been trying to nail this psycho for 2 years. But try to remember a little thing like official police procedure. Now where are the hostages?

John Spartan They're not here.

Captain Healy What do mean they're not here, are you sure?

John Spartan Because I did a thermo check. They're only 8 people, all a part of his gang.

Simon Phoenix [Being arrested] Wrong again.

John Spartan Do you have something to say, scum bag?

Captain Healy [to officer apprehending Phoenix] Get him out of here.

[to Spartan]

Captain Healy You and I are gonna have a nice long chat.

Fire Fighter [Coming in] Captain. Captain.

Captain Healy What.

Fire Fighter We've checked the building. There's bodies everywhere, there has to be about 20 or 30, they're everywhere.

[Spartan looks in disbelief]

Simon Phoenix See Captain. I told him, he said he didn't care.

[Spartan charges at Phoenix but is restrained by his fellow officers]

Simon Phoenix Oh shit, I can't believe that you gave up 30 hostages for little old me. We're gonna have a nice time together. See ya' sweetie. Honey! Sugar!

Captain Healy Hope you called your lawyer, because you're gonna need him.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix You're dead, Spartan!

John Spartan You forgot to say Simon Says.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan [to Garcia] Well, look at you. You get a bump on the noggin, and you think you're Pancho Villa?

Alfredo Garcia [Garcia looks confused] Who?

John Spartan [Spartan shaking his head] Never mind.

Edgar Friendly [to Spartan] Time to take a stand, pal.

John Spartan [to Edgar] Well, good. While you're doing that, loan me a gun.

[Edgar hands Spartan a gun]

John Spartan Loan me two guns.

[Wastelander hands Spartan a waste belt with a gun in it. Spartan puts the belt over his shoulder]

Chief George Earle [to Edgar and Wastelanders] You use these weapons of mass destruction against men and women who uphold the law?

Edgar Friendly [to Chief] We use these weapons to shop for groceries.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Erwin [14:38] Greetings and salutations. Welcome to the emergency line of the San Angeles Police Department. If you'd prefer an automated response, press 1 now.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan You're under arrest, Phoenix.

Simon Phoenix Arrest? Shit. And you're trespassing.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan I'm gonna go down there, I'm gonna find Phoenix, and I'm gonna put him in a hurt locker.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix I must've done something right in a previous life. Can't imagine what that could've been.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley You are a savage creature, John Spartan, and I wish for you to leave my domicile now!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley I find this lack of stimulus to be truly disappointing, don't you think?

Warden William Smithers - Aged I try not to, my dear. However, you're young, think all you want!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix So let me get this right, they defrosted you just so you could lasso my piddly ass? Damn, you been had! I been dreamin' about killin' you for forty years.

John Spartan Well, keep dreaming!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Why don't you just shove a leash up my ass?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley I thought your life force had been prematurely terminated!

John Spartan Yeah, I thought I was history too. What the hell happened? All of a sudden, this car turned into a cannoli.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[Spartan and Huxley enter and see Cocteau's face speaking to them from dozens of monitors]

Dr. Cocteau Forgive my lack of bodily disposition, but I do have an entire city government to run.

John Spartan Yeah, well run this: you programmed Phoenix's rehabilitation program to turn him into a terrorist, and I don't think his escape was an accident either!

Lenina Huxley Very subtle.

John Spartan Thank you.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Chief George Earle I monitored your disheartening and distressing comments to the warden this morning. Do you really long for chaos and disharmony? Your fascination with the vulgar 20th century seems to be affecting your better judgement. You realize you're setting a bad example for other officers and sworn personnel.

Lenina Huxley Thank you for the attitude adjustment, Chief Earle. Info assimilated.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Dr. Cocteau John Spartan, this display of barbaric behavior was unacceptable even in your time!

John Spartan Yeah. But it worked.

[Shoots out the monitors with Cocteau's face on them]

John Spartan When a man like Phoenix has a gun to your head, ten seconds is 9.5 seconds longer than you live.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Warden William Smithers - Aged Do you have anything new to say on your behalf?

Simon Phoenix Yeah, I do. Teddy Bear!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan You're on TV!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan You know, I keep looking around and I think about my daughter growing up in a place like this and I'm afraid she's gonna think I'm some kind of primitive. That I mean, as much as I wanna see her, I almost don't want to 'cause I wouldn't fit into the picture very well. Not very well at all.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Dr. Cocteau Well I must say that whacking, whatever it is, sounds most disagreeable.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Edgar Friendly [referring to Phoenix] They thawed this guy out just to kill me? I'm flattered.

John Spartan Don't be flattered, be frightened. This guy's a certifiable nightmare, the sort of nightmare that makes Freddy Krueger look like Herman Munster.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[first lines]

Zachary Lamb - Young Remember when they used to let commercial airlines land in this town?

Helicopter Pilot Yeah. Well, I don't understand where we're going, or why the hell we're bothering anyhow.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan [after he's made Huxley a sweater] I came out of rehab and the first thing I wanted to do was *knit*!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley [complementing Spartan] You are even better live than on Laserdisc!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan [commenting on his cryo-prison conditioning program] I'm a seamstress? - That's great. I come out of cryo-prison and I'm Betsy-fucking-Ross...

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix [after his gang kills Dr. Cocteau] Put another log on the fire!

[the gang throws Cocteau into the fireplace]

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Chief George Earle We can just wait for another code to go red. And when Phoenix performs another Murder Death Kill, we'll know exactly where to pounce.

John Spartan [sarcastic] Great plan.

Chief George Earle [not realising the sarcasm] Thank you.

Erwin He likes your plan, Chief!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan I remember when you were a snot-nosed rookie pilot.

Zachary Lamb - Aged They finally grounded me.

John Spartan Shit! *buzz!* You were a damn good flyer. *buzz!*

Alfredo Garcia They seem to be friends, yet he speaks to him in the most profane manner

Lenina Huxley Well, if you had read my study, you would know this is how insecure heterosexual males used to bond.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Dr. Cocteau Isn't there a thought repeating in that barbaric brain of yours? The name Friendly? Mr. Edgar Friendly? Don't you have someone to kill?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[a frozen naked criminal swings by overhead]

Simon Phoenix I hope my butt didn't look like that! Okay, who do we have left that's good? Wilkes, Patrick... Jeffrey Dahmer? I love that guy!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[Simon's museum piece "ray gun" beeps ready]

Simon Phoenix It's about time! The past is over, John! Time for something new and improved!

John Spartan Aw, hell...

[he leaps out of the way as Simon fires an energy blast from the rifle, blowing a hydrant apart]

Simon Phoenix Holy shit! I love this gun!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[Huge Explosion, John Spartan steps from the wreckage]

Simon Phoenix I'll be god damned! Like a New York cockroach!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

[after Spartan crashes in a police car]

Lenina Huxley Look at you, you're in shambles!

John Spartan Don't worry, I can fix it. All I need is a needle and thread.

[pause]

John Spartan I really didn't say that, did I? Damn!

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Simon Phoenix See, I told the city, I said "Look, nobody comes down here." Postmen figured it out. Policemen figured it out. But the goddamned bus drivers just wouldn't listen.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Is it cold in here, or is it just me?

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan Heads up!

[decapitates frozen Phoenix]

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Lenina Huxley [Huxley and Spartan are using virtual-reality helmets to make love, when Spartan abruptly removes his] ... What's wrong? You broke contact.

John Spartan Contact? I didn't even touch you yet!

Lenina Huxley But I thought you wanted to make love.

John Spartan That's what you call this?

[She replaces and readjusts his helmet]

Lenina Huxley Vir-sex has been shown to produce higher levels of alpha waves during digitized transference of sexual energies.

John Spartan Right; what say we just do it the old-fashioned way?

[He removes his helmet and prepares to kiss her for real]

Lenina Huxley Ugh; disgusting! You mean... *fluid transfer?*

John Spartan No; I mean boning, the wild mambo, the hunka-chunka...

Lenina Huxley That is no longer done. The exchange of bodily fluids... Do you know what that leads to?

John Spartan Yeah! Kids, smoking, raiding the fridge...

Lenina Huxley The rampant exchange of bodily fluids was among the major reasons for the downfall of society. After AIDS, there was NRS; after NRS, there was UBT. One of the first things that Dr. Cocteau did was outlaw, and behaviorally engineer, all fluid-transfer out of socially-acceptable behavior. Not even mouth-to-mouth is condoned.

John Spartan Kissing's not allowed?

[Huxley winces at the thought]

John Spartan Damn, and I've always been a good kisser.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Zachary Lamb - Aged Phoenix is an old fashioned criminal. We need an old fashioned cop.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

John Spartan [waking up fom the Cryo-prison] Where am I?

Alfredo Garcia [doubtful] Uh, I, uh...

John Spartan When am I?

Alfredo Garcia Uh, it's Thursday. Tomorrow's Arbor day. And last week you turned eighty-four years old. Happy Birthday.

Lenina Huxley Detective, I'm Lieutenant Huxley. The year is 2042. Now the reason you've been released...

John Spartan [shaking it off] How long have I been under?

Lenina Huxley [grieved] ... Forty-four years.

John Spartan [trying to focus] I had a wife... What happened to my wife?

Lenina Huxley Your wife's light was extinguished in the Big One of 2010.

[off his confused look]

Lenina Huxley Oh, she died. In an earthquake. The earthquake. This takes a moment to sink in. Then, defrosting, haltingly...

John Spartan My wife and I, we had a girl. A daughter. I made a promise. What...

Chief George Earle John Spartan! I am Chief of Police George Earle. We did not thaw you for a family reunion. It is fortunate the lieutenant even did a probe on your wife. This is about you and a Mr. Simon Phoenix.

Chief George Earle [fully awake] What?

Lenina Huxley This morning Phoenix escaped from this cryo facility. We've had nine murder death kills so far. We have become a society of peace, loving and understanding. And we are, quite frankly, not equipped to deal with this situation.

Alfredo Garcia There have been no deaths of unnatural causes in San Angeles in the last sixteen years.

John Spartan [Puzzled] Where?

Lenina Huxley The Santa Barbara, Los Angeles, San Diego metroplex merged in 2011. You are in the center of what used to be Los Angeles.

John Spartan [Spartan creaks his head toward Garcia] Just get me some Marlboros.

Alfredo Garcia Of course. Right away. What are...

John Spartan A cigarette. Just get me a cigarette.

Lenina Huxley Cigarettes are not good for you and it has been deemed that everything that is not good for you is bad. Hence... illegal. Alcohol, caffeine, contact sports, meat...

John Spartan Are you shittin' me?

Moral Statute Machine John Spartan, you are fined one credit for a violation of verbal morality statute 113.

John Spartan What the fuck is that?

Moral Statute Machine John Spartan, you are fined one credit for a violation of...

Lenina Huxley Bad language, chocolate, gasoline, uneducational toys, and anything spicy. Abortion's also illegal, but then again so's pregnancy if you don't have a license.

Chief George Earle Caveman, let us finish all the Rip Van Winkle and get moving. A Mr. Phoenix has risen from the ashes.

John Spartan [reluctant] Uh-uh. I tracked that dirtbag years for two years, and when I finally brought him down, they turned me into an ice cube for my trouble. Thanks, but no thanks.

Chief George Earle The conditions of your parole are full reinstatement into the S.A.P.D. and immediate assignment to the apprehension of Simon Phoenix, or you can go back into cryo-stasis.

Lenina Huxley Not many people get a second chance, John Spartan.

🧡

👏

🥺

🤔

🥱

Demolition Man Movie Quotes