Kinoafisha Films Bookworm Bookworm Movie Quotes

Bookworm Movie Quotes

Strawn Mildred, it's me. Strawn. Your dad. I just flew halfway across the world to be with you, little lady.

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Mildred So, what does the average working day for an illusionist look like?

Strawn Well, I do appearances. Parties. Actually, last week, I just did a major celebrity's birthday party.

Mildred [sarcastic] Wow.

Strawn [scoffs] You know, you could try being a little bit more respectful.

Mildred Oh, sure I could. I just can't promise I will.

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Zo You sure do know a crap-ton of words, don't you, my girl?

Mildred I'm a card-carrying bookworm, so, yes, I sure do know a crap-ton of words.

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Strawn Hey. Do you want to see something amazing?

[Mildred continues to read]

Strawn I said... do you want to see something - amazing?

Mildred Will it take a long time?

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Mildred See these black and green mushrooms?

Strawn Yeah.

Mildred Well, if we ever get separated, don't ever eat those.

Strawn Why? What happens?

Mildred Full body numbness, hallucinations, possible nausea, and projectile vomiting.

Strawn Oh. Sounds fun.

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Mildred Am I still dreaming, or did a 42-year-old man really just wake up an 11-year-old girl to tell her that he heard a creepy sound in the night?

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Strawn I'm thinking that between getting you kidnapped, attacked by a panther, thrown off a cliff, and feeding you weird mushrooms, I've secured my place on the Mount Rushmore of disappointing dads.

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Strawn What I do is both physically and mentally exhausting. My wrist strength is equivalent to that of a professional wrestler. You think it's easy making a hundred balloon animals for Vin Diesel's kids?

Mildred Balloon animals. And they say air traffic controllers have stressful jobs. And what the hell is a Vin Diesel?

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Strawn I know what you look like. The... the cops will do a composite sketch.

Arnold I'll just go home, cut my hair, shave off my beard, and nobody will recognize me.

Strawn What about Angelina?

Arnold She'll shave her beard off too.

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Strawn Can I come in?

Dotty Can I see some ID?

Strawn ID?

Dotty Yeah. It stands for Identification Document.

Strawn I would love to show you some ID, but there's a problem. You see, you actually have it.

Dotty I have it?

Strawn That's right.

Dotty What do you mean, mate?

Strawn You have my ID.

Dotty I do? Where?

[Strawn pulls a passport from Dotty's ear]

Dotty I have to say, normally, I find magicians skin-crawlingly embarrassing, but you're actually half-decent.

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Strawn You know, this entire trip, you've been nothing about a grade-A, D-bag.

Mildred Yeah? Well, it takes one to know one, doesn't it?

Strawn A pretentious, prickly runt.

Mildred I know you are, you said you were, so what am I?

Strawn You're an asshole.

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Mildred I found her secret diary once. It said that she met you on a girls' trip to Vegas. Says I was conceived in the parking lot of a convenience store. That's not really true, is it?

Strawn Yeah.

Mildred And they say romance is dead.

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Mildred Mom? If you sneak up on me again, I will pee myself. And you're gonna have to clean it up.

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