JonathanI don't want to die, I just don't want to be alive.
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JonathanSee, Dr Figure was a no-medication type of guy and all the hard core suicidals in his group - now including myself - had agreed not to kill or harm themselves before January 1st. I mean, can you imagine someone dead, hanging from the light fixture in their room, thinking, If my doctor finds out about this, I'm FUCKED."
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Dr. FigureWhat would you do if you were allowed home for the afternoon?
Jonathan[inhales]Get a decent cup of coffee then I'd chop me head off with a chainsaw.
Dr. FigureOkay. Uh - uh, just one thing. I wanted to propose something. It's like a pledge between doctor and patient. We nominate a day, like three weeks from now - like New Year's Day - and you mustn't harm yourself until that day. You have to stick to it. What do you think about that?
JonathanYeah, I think it's a fuckin' ridiculous idea.
JonathanYou can never really know what was going through a person's mind at that exact moment. If they survive, they'll never tell you. If they succeed, all you can do is spend the rest of your life feeling guilty. You're only concern can be for the people they leave behind. They're the ones to look out for.
Rachel RowSo you are all good now? Too many near death experiences you are beginning to think twice.
JonathanYou wanna know the truth? If it's a matter of life and death between people like you and me, then I want to outlive you. And I want to see what happens to you. 'Cause I like ya.
Dr. FigureWhat's gonna happen to you? I can only help people who are really sick. And then half the time it doesn't work. Who's gonna help you?
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JonathanI know more about the business of suicide in my baby finger, than you do in all your years of training and Freud reading. I gurran-fuckin'-tee ya that.