Castle Keep Movie Quotes
Maj. Abraham Falconer
I understand you've been sleeping with the Volkswagen
Cpl. Clearboy
Yes sir, Is there a regulation against it sir?
Cpl. Clearboy
Sodomy?
Maj. Abraham Falconer
That's animals, there's a regulation against using enemy equipment. Creates confusion.
Cpl. Clearboy
Sir, she's a beautiful car, sir
Maj. Abraham Falconer
You must love the Volkswagen very much Corporal Clearboy
Cpl. Clearboy
36 Horses. No water, sir. Hides her engine in the rear, air cooled, no water, sir!
Maj. Abraham Falconer
Is the world suffering a water shortage Corporal Clearboy?
Cpl. Clearboy
Not now sir, but suppose this war just goes on and on and on and destroys everything in the world. Well, since the Volkswagen can get along without water, she's bound to survive when other creatures die off. Someday the world is going to be populated with nothing but Volkswagens!
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Sfc. Rossie Baker
[enterting brothel with loaves]
Everybody should eat more bread. Feeds the heart. And remember, the heart's the second-most important organ in the human body.
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Sfc. Rossie Baker
If we get caught, can they shoot us for wearing a German tank?
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Maj. Abraham Falconer
What do you see out there, Beckman?
Capt. Lionel Beckman
No Krauts yet!
Maj. Abraham Falconer
You never will. You're a dreamer, Beckman. They'll get you first!
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Pvt. Allistair Piersall Benjamin
Napoleon before Venice said, 'If my cannon destroy but one statue, I would rather not take Venice.
Capt. Lionel Beckman
Did Napoleon say that? Doesn't sound like Napoleon.
Pvt. Allistair Piersall Benjamin
Oh, well, no he didn't, but I thought it would cheer you up.
Capt. Lionel Beckman
I appreciate that, but Napoleon was a louse.
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Pvt. Allistair Piersall Benjamin
My purpose is madness. It's the only way you can really tell what happens in war. By lying you can open the door a little crack on the truth.
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Cpl. Clearboy
...or we can swim the moat.
Sfc. Rossie Baker
The moat? What the hell war is this?
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The Count
The Maldorais line must continue, and God must know where the Americans fit. Americans are brave, and that is why they seem like children. They are young, wild animals, so what can you expect?... I expect a child.
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Sfc. Rossie Baker
Listen, battles are lost because people get excited. There's only one way to calm the situation down - go to bed with a woman. Afterwards you'll be able to concentrate.
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Maj. Abraham Falconer
When the German tanks get here, we'll have a reception. They're brave sons of bitches, and we should not allow their heroic actions to go unsung. They should all have a cocktail!
Red Queen
Cocktail?
Maj. Abraham Falconer
Cognac bottle filled with gasoline.
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Maj. Abraham Falconer
I warned you about thinking, Beckman!
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The Count
You find me degenerate - or worse even, French.
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Lt. Billy Byron Bix
[leading singing]
Sfc. Rossie Baker
Hey, you're waking everybody up! Go back to your outfit!
Sfc. Rossie Baker
You're waking everybody up, go back to your outfit.
Lt. Billy Byron Bix
We have no outfit. We've withdrawn. We don't believe in fighting.
Sfc. Rossie Baker
Well who believes in fighting?
Lt. Billy Byron Bix
We believe in God. That frightens you, doesn't it? All you believe in is fornication, and killing.
Sfc. Rossie Baker
What?
Lt. Billy Byron Bix
We're conscientious objectors!
Sfc. Rossie Baker
You mean, you conscientiously object to fornicating?
Lt. Billy Byron Bix
[leads singing again, loudly]
Sfc. Rossie Baker
[taps Lt. Bix on shoulder as singing continues]
Hey! Didn't you tell 'em? They're supposed to excuse you from combat.
Lt. Billy Byron Bix
They said that our sect was too small!
Sfc. Rossie Baker
Your what was too small?
Lt. Billy Byron Bix
Sect! S-E-C-T!
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Sfc. Rossie Baker
Did you hear a scream? Like a woman, or an eagle... or a world coming to an end.
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