We Bought a Zoo Movie Quotes
Benjamin Mee
You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.
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[last lines]
Benjamin Mee
Why would an amazing woman like you even talk to someone like me?
Katherine Mee
Why not?
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Dylan Mee
I get it now, okay? I get why you can't stand me!
Benjamin Mee
Okay. All right.
Dylan Mee
No. At least now I know the real reason why you hate me! Look, I heard you admit it to her! Like you were talking about cornflakes. You hate me!
[rushes up the stairs]
Benjamin Mee
I hate you? Wait second.
[follows Dylan]
Benjamin Mee
Okay, we've had some problems, man, but we've figuring it out, okay?
Dylan Mee
Oh, that is bullshit! Admit it! You wish I wasn't here! With that expression in my eyes? I heard you!
Benjamin Mee
Hold on! Enough with the drama, all right? Knock it off! You misheard me!
Dylan Mee
I can't stand it here! Look, can't you see that?
Benjamin Mee
No, but thank you for telling me, again! I keep forgetting, it's all about you!
[Dylan looks a little guilty]
Benjamin Mee
Why don't I just pack us up? We'll just go on the road together. We could be hobos.
Dylan Mee
Because you wasted all our money! Some of that belonged to me, Dad!
Benjamin Mee
I didn't waste our money. I thought you liked it here. And I'm sorry, I thought your friends would come out and visit you, man. I called them all myself and I invited them. And I'm sorry, I thought you and Lily were friends. I thought, I thought, I thought, I thought this was... I mean, I thought you liked me! I thought this was a dream come true for all of us.
Dylan Mee
It's your dream! You can't force a dream on someone else, Dad!
Benjamin Mee
Yes, I can, I can force a dream on you!
Dylan Mee
Why are you yelling?
Benjamin Mee
[exploding]
Because it's a good dream! And it's got cool animals in it and some pretty great people, too!
[Dylan is now on the verge of crying]
Benjamin Mee
And because I'm your father and I'm the only one you've got! And the line of people in this world who really care about you ends here! So stop moping around this place, man! And pick up a shovel and dig a hole! Do something! You just sit here and feel sorry for yourself, man! Help me with your sister! Help me, damn it!
[Benjamin and Dylan finally stop the argument to look at each other. Benjamin sighs]
Benjamin Mee
[calmer]
I'm sorry that your mother got sick when she did. Believe me. I'm sorry that you didn't get more of a childhood, man. That's just how that one went. But we live here with a seven-year-old girl who still believes in the Easter Bunny. What are we gonna do?
Dylan Mee
You never ask me how I'm doing. You never even taught me how to shave.
[walks away into his room. Benjamin follows him]
Benjamin Mee
[through the door]
Wait, you wanna know how to shave? I would love to teach you how to shave! Let's shave!
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Peter MacCready
[to a lion]
You don't want me. I am filled with Scotch and bitterness and impure thoughts.
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[Dylan sees letters that spells "If you love me, let me know" on the store window, and decides to run towards Lily's cabin]
Dylan Mee
20 seconds of courage. 20 seconds of courage. Okay. Okay.
[knocks on Lily's window. She squeals a disturbed noise, turns around and sees him. She walks to the window and opens it]
Lily Miska
Hi.
Dylan Mee
Hi. Look, am I nuts to say that I missed you like crazy a lot? A lot!
[Lily shakes her head]
Dylan Mee
I was... I wasn't named after Bob Dylan. I was named after a dog named Dylan.
Dylan Mee
No, I love it. I love your hair, I love your sign, Lily, I love you.
[Lily stops laughing the moment he says the word "you". They look at each other for a while, then smile before they move in for a hug through the window opening]
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Rosie Mee
[as Walter Ferris is finalizing his inspection]
You know, everybody here thinks you're a dick. I don't know what that means, but I don't think that.
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Dylan Mee
I guess I just can't talk to girls that well.
Kelly Foster
Well, talking to girls is easy. They'll tell you everything. The secret to talking is listening
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Benjamin Mee
You seem really calm.
Peter MacCready
Ah.
Benjamin Mee
Have you been drinking?
Peter MacCready
All night long.
Benjamin Mee
Thanks for that.
Peter MacCready
Anytime.
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Benjamin Mee
What happened with you and Lily?
Dylan Mee
I don't know. I guess I didn't listen to something she told me or something? I mean, I liked her. It's like you embarrass yourself if you say something, and you embarrass yourself if you don't.
[Benjamin chuckles. Dylan smiles as well]
Benjamin Mee
I like it when you talk. You know, sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage. Just, literally, 20 seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.
[Dylan looks thoughtful, but doesn't say anything for a while]
Dylan Mee
I never know what to say to you.
Benjamin Mee
I'm the same way. Why don't we just tell each other what we wish the other guy would say?
Dylan Mee
"I'm sorry I brought you out to the sticks."
Benjamin Mee
"You're a great dad."
[both Dylan and Benjamin laugh]
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Benjamin Mee
I want you to know, I think you're incredibly pretty. Please don't take offense if I don't hit on you.
Kelly Foster
I'd be offended if you did.
Benjamin Mee
Good.
Kelly Foster
I'm a big fan of people being exactly who they are.
Benjamin Mee
Exactly.
Kelly Foster
So we think alike.
Benjamin Mee
We do.
Kelly Foster
And if I wanted to be kissed by you, you wouldn't have a choice.
Benjamin Mee
Thank you. I think. I don't doubt that. What did we just say?
Kelly Foster
I don't know.
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Rosie Mee
Daddy, I can't sleep. The neighbors again.
Benjamin Mee
Come on.
Rosie Mee
Their happy is too loud.
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Duncan Mee
Travel the stages of grieving, yet, stop just *before* zebras get involved.
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Benjamin Mee
[loosing track of Rosie at the zoo]
Oh God, I keep her home one day from school and she gets eaten!
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Lily Miska
[to Kelly during the opening of the zoo]
If you had to choose between people and animals, who would you pick?
[Kelly doesn't answer]
Lily Miska
Me, too. People!
Kelly Foster
You goofball.
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Rosie Mee
[to Walter]
Hey, mister. Everybody says your a dick. I don't know what that means, but I don't believe it.
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Dylan Mee
It's like he was expelling me for my artwork.
Benjamin Mee
I can live almost with the artwork. I mean, if Charles Manson needed a personal muralist, you'd be the guy.
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Rosie Mee
Dylan likes Lily.
Dylan Mee
Please, she's way younger than me. She's 12. It doesn't work like that.
Rosie Mee
She's about a foot taller.
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Duncan Mee
I like the animals. But, I love the humans.
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Duncan Mee
I said "human" interaction. This is what happens when people have a you-know-what occur in their lives. They wake up one day and they say, "I'm going to quit my job and try something completely different with my life." But then they wake up another day and they say to themselves, "Thank God my older brother didn't let my blow Dad's inheritance by buying a broken-down zoo in the country nine miles from the nearest Target store."
Benjamin Mee
But maybe my older brother didn't see this place.
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[first lines]
Dylan Mee
My dad is a writer who specialized in adventure.
Benjamin Mee
This is Benjamin Mee. I am surrounded by hundreds, probably thousands of killer bees. If I wasn't wearing this suit, I would be dead in an instant.
Dylan Mee
He interviewed dangerous dictators.
Hugo Chavez
Take this message to that American cowboy. We already gave a 10 billion dollar oil credit to China. Swallow that, Mr. Danger!
Benjamin Mee
What's your favorite movie?
Hugo Chavez
Toy Story.
[to his staff]
Hugo Chavez
The first one or the second one?
Segundo
The second.
Dylan Mee
He even flew into the center of Hurricane Charley.
Pilot
About two minutes. This hurricane, sir, Charley is really kneading us well, sir.
Benjamin Mee
Tell me when it gets severe!
Dylan Mee
He knew the ins and outs of strange and exotic adventure, backwards and forwards. But nothing prepared him for this one.
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Duncan Mee
You do somethin' for the right reasons, nothing can stop you.
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Rosie Mee
[after Benjamin and Dylan's fight]
What about the Easter bunny?
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Benjamin Mee
It is what it is.
Mr. Stevens
It is what it is. Sometimes you don't know what it is until you see what it is, you know? Once you see what it is then you can figure out what it is. You understand?
Benjamin Mee
No, but we can move on.
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Robin Jones
Well, Ferris lusts you.
Kelly Foster
I'm not takin' one for the team, if that's what you're gettin' after.
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Dylan Mee
Dad, it's whatever. Look, I'll know it when I get to school.
Benjamin Mee
You know what? "Whatever" is the laziest word of the 20th century, all right? I'm - I've had it with "whatever." I don't want to hear it again in this century ever again. "Whatever" is over.
Rosie Mee
He says it all the time. He won't have anything left to say in this century.
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Benjamin Mee
The posts in the cages?
Kelly Foster
The posts in what? Look, they're not called cages, they're called enclosures. They haven't been called cages in like a century. My brief marriage, that was a cage.
Benjamin Mee
Not mine.
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Dylan Mee
Dad'll be back soon. He's just having a mood.
Kelly Foster
Yeah? How long do those last?
Dylan Mee
A couple of years.
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Benjamin Mee
We bought a zoo.
Duncan Mee
We did that.
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Kelly Foster
I have a question for you. You're some random guy from the city. No one in the zoo community has ever heard of you. You know nothing about animals. And you've moved into a dump. I mean, what kind of regular person just up and buys a place like this? Especially somebody with kids. Why? You have no idea what we've been dealing with here. We used to have three times the staff. They all quit. I'm 28. I never go out. I'm here every day. My girlfriends, they text me, they're out livin' their lives, meeting guys named Brett, and I'm here shovellin' shit. Bear shit! I'm pathetic! I had to move back in with my mother. No one gets paid, Ben - jamin. We need somebody who can really take charge of this place or else we and all these animals are gone.
Benjamin Mee
So your question is?
Kelly Foster
Why did you buy this place?
Benjamin Mee
Why not?
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Rhonda Blair
I am warning you now. Behind that front is a front! Benjamin Mee is a fraud!
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Duncan Mee
Holy shit. Okay. Here's the revised Duncan plan. Dump the animals. Keep Kelly. That's true joy.
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Principal
We're a three-strike school, Mr. Mee, and today was his fourth strike. I'm sorry. We have to expel Dylan.
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Duncan Mee
believe you should court the girl we met at Jamba Juice. She's a stunner.
Benjamin Mee
She keeps callin' me to go hiking.
Duncan Mee
Benjamin, hike her.
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Benjamin Mee
Hey, Rosie? Am I doin' anything right?
Rosie Mee
You're handsomer than the other dads. Lots of them don't have hair. So that's good.
Benjamin Mee
Awesome. I'm gonna take baldness off my list of things to worry about.
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Benjamin Mee
All right, McGinty, so get this. I go to the volcano eruption site. And I take the kids. And I write about the end of the world from the point of view of the generation that's gonna save it. And we do a whole thing about how life is elemental, and all the software, and laptops, and apps in the world aren't gonna change that. And we call it - you ready? iPocalypse.
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Benjamin Mee
How long you been doin' this job?
Mr. Stevens
First day. It's my first day.
Benjamin Mee
Really?
Mr. Stevens
Hell, yeah. First day! And so, our adventure begins.
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Mr. Stevens
It has complications to it, Mr. Mee. And...
[lion roars in the background]
Mr. Stevens
It's a zoo.
Benjamin Mee
A zoo?
Mr. Stevens
It's a zoo.
Rosie Mee
Yay!
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Benjamin Mee
The hills don't have to roll, right, honey?
[Rosie shakes her head yes]
Benjamin Mee
Just new.
Mr. Stevens
Know what? It's all about new. People love new. I love new. Hell, I'm new! Excuse my language, but I'm new. Hell, I'm new.
Benjamin Mee
I'm glad you're excited about it.
Mr. Stevens
You know? I'm excited about new stuff. New - is the new old.
Benjamin Mee
New.
Mr. Stevens
New, new, new.
Benjamin Mee
Benjamin Mee, Mr. Stevens: New!
Rosie Mee
I like you.
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Benjamin Mee
Complicated's okay. Complicated can be great. We love complicated.
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Kelly Foster
Tigers and lions are very different. Tigers don't growl or roar, they chuff. Like, umph-umph-umph. Umph-umph-umph.
Rosie Mee
Umph-umph-umph.
Kelly Foster
Yeah. When you chuff at them, they chuff back.
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Benjamin Mee
What did we talk about? A new place. A new start.
Dylan Mee
This is what *you* want. It's not what *I* want!
Benjamin Mee
What?
Dylan Mee
It's a zoo.
[walks away, in disbelief]
Dylan Mee
I'm moving to a zoo.
Rosie Mee
We bought a zoo!
Benjamin Mee
Yes, we did. We did buy a zoo.
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Kelly Foster
He's 17. He's a Bengal tiger. You know, tigers have special sensors in the front of their two-inch canines. They can actually detect the pulse in your aorta. So when they attack, they bite you, take your pulse with their teeth, reposition those suckers and boom, there goes your carotid.
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Dylan Mee
Whatever!
Rosie Mee
You're not supposed to say that in this century.
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Duncan Mee
It's great. I get it. This whole spiritual journey or whatever. You know, we're all in cages, man. I love it. But, at the risk of stating the obvious, you're insane. Okay?
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Benjamin Mee
I just want you to be happy, man. Unless you don't want to be happy.
Dylan Mee
What is so great about being happy?
Benjamin Mee
That you're happy.
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Kelly Foster
What do I know? I still live with my mother. I'm not good with people.
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Kelly Foster
You're doing very well. You know, I expected you to be heading for the hills by now.
Benjamin Mee
Well, we got through today.
Kelly Foster
Yeah, we got through today.
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Benjamin Mee
It's the wrong day for this to be happening, man. I got your sister home sick from school. And you, I mean - how do they send someone home early for moodiness?
Dylan Mee
I don't know. It's a sensitive school.
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Benjamin Mee
I thought if I came out here it would stop. Back home, every place reminded me of her. Filippe's on Third Street. Balboa Park. Little Dom's, the coffee shop. That - that's a big one. I mean, the air, the way it smelled in May and August, because those were the months that her favorite bushes grew flowers all over our neighborhood. They're all triggers, man. And it got better for a while. I mean, it - it did, out here. But the funny thing is that it just turns out that she's here, too.
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Benjamin Mee
Look, this doesn't feel right.
Kelly Foster
Benjamin, it never feels right.
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Benjamin Mee
What I've figured out is that when you love somebody that much, that hard, that long, you can never get away from them, no matter where you go. And that only comes once in a lifetime. Just can't get a handle on it. I cannot let go.
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Benjamin Mee
If only I could talk to her about getting over her.
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Benjamin Mee
I'm your fan, man. Don't you know that by now?
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Kelly Foster
I'm gonna distract him from the other side of this enclosure and you're gonna not get eaten!
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Duncan Mee
I asked him if you guys needed any help. In the trunk of this car is haddock. Two hundred pounds' worth. For Bruno.
Benjamin Mee
Buster.
Duncan Mee
Whatever.
Benjamin Mee
Are you serious?
Duncan Mee
No. Serious is the smell in that car. I started questioning my entire being back there on the 405. It was like 'Altered States'. I saw an iguana and a dwarf Indian.
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Benjamin Mee
Circus money, man. Our adventure is just beginning.
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Mr. Stevens
Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Let's - let's - let's just take it all in first. Don't take a gift that's not given to you yet, now. All right?
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Benjamin Mee
It's not about where an adventure ends, 'cause that's not what an adventure's about. So anything that happens from here on out is a bonus.
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