Kinoafisha Films Space Cowboys Space Cowboys Movie Quotes

Space Cowboys Movie Quotes

[the crew are guests on the Tonight show]

Jay Leno Now you all have military backgrounds... North or South?

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Frank Corvin Well, what do you say, Reverend? You think a prayer's in order?

Tank Sullivan I was just reciting the Shepard's Prayer. Alan Shepard's prayer. Oh Lord, please don't let us screw up. Amen.

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Frank Corvin You know what the worst day of my life was? The day Neil Armstrong set foot on the moon. I was probably the only person in America who wanted to commit suicide that day.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Well, thanks a lot Frank. We haven't spoken in twelve years and that's basically been the big question on my mind, what could make you commit suicide.

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Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins [Frank and Hawk are inside the centrifuge/spinning machine, which is about to be started] The first one to pass out buys the beers tonight...

Frank Corvin [machine start spinning] You're on...

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins [machine speed increases and it's moving really fast] This thing's moving?...

Frank Corvin I don't know... Doesn't seems to be moving to me...

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins [machine speed continues to increase] Say, fellas, is y'all's equipment broke down? Fellas?

[everybody's watching the show]

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins You're a pushover, Frank!

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins [machine is now spinning at top speed] I do believe it's moving now...

Tank Sullivan That sure will take the wrinkles out.

Eugene 'Gene' Davis [walking into the control room] WHAT the hell is going on here?

[crowd disappears]

Eugene 'Gene' Davis [really pissed, hits the emergency stop on the centrifuge] I'm sure you think you're putting on a great show, but this is not a toy! Now which one of you assholes wants to explain this?

Frank Corvin Gene?

Eugene 'Gene' Davis What?

Frank Corvin Which one of us passed out first?

Eugene 'Gene' Davis I'm getting too old for this shit...

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Frank Corvin This is Jerry O'Neill.

Sara Holland No nickname for you?

Jerry O'Neill You can call me

[kisses her hand]

Jerry O'Neill anytime.

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Frank Corvin My only hope is that whatever doesn't burn up lands on Gerson's house.

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Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Have you noticed how everybody seems to be dead lately?

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Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins What is a pancreas, anyhow? I mean, I don't know what the damn thing does for you, besides give you cancer.

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Tiny, Bar Bouncer I'll put you in the hospital, old man.

Frank Corvin Yeah? Well, I've got Medicare. Go ahead and shoot your best shot!

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[Frank and Hawk are asking a waitress who she would prefer to 'take home']

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Would you prefer this man, with his asymmetrical sagging ass-cheeks, his love-handles the size of Nebraska, and his oh-so-ugly in-grown toenail...?

Frank Corvin [interrupting] Or this son of a bitch with the chicken-gizzard neck and the face that looks like thirty miles of Death Valley fire trail?

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Frank Corvin Clock's ticking, Bob. And I'm only getting older.

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Jerry O'Neill I'm an engineer! I stopped running when Nixon was president!

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[Last Lines]

[Frank and Barbara Corvin are standing by their home and staring at the Moon]

Barbara Corvin Do you think he

[Hawkins]

Barbara Corvin made it?

Frank Corvin Yeah, I think he made it.

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Eugene 'Gene' Davis Morning, Hawk.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Good morning.

Eugene 'Gene' Davis What happened to your eye?

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins l fell in the shower. Tell maintenance to put some no-slip adhesives on that slippery floor.

Eugene 'Gene' Davis How's it going, Frank?

Frank Corvin Fine, fine.

Eugene 'Gene' Davis Whats with the eye? Slip in the shower?

Frank Corvin How would you know that?

Eugene 'Gene' Davis l think I'll have a chat with the janitor.

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Jerry O'Neill It's got nothing to do with me. It all depends on the woman and how willing she is to discover her infinite supply of orgasms.

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Frank Corvin [after Hawk crashes the shuttle during a simulation] Hawk, this isn't a stripped-down showplane. You've got to do it their way.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins I don't need a damn computer to tell me how to land an aircraft.

Roger Hines It's not an aircraft, Colonel. It's a flying brick, and you've GOT to use the computer's protocols.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins What if the on-board computer fails?

Ethan Glance It never has.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins [to the simulator supervisor] Houston, Horizon.

Mission Control Tech Go ahead.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Request second landing please.

[pause]

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Houston - Horizon, request on board computer FAILURE on second landing.

Eugene 'Gene' Davis Run it again. Sock it to 'em.

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Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins What are you doing here?

Frank Corvin Keeping a promise I made years ago.

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Was that the promise you made to kill me or the promise you made to have both my legs broke?

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[challenging Frank to fight]

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Okay, bad guy, we're taking this outside! I want to whip your asymmetrical sagging ass! Get out there in that parking lot!

[Frank and Hawk step outside]

Jerry O'Neill Here we go again...

Tank Sullivan I've got ten on Frank!

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Frank Corvin You sent us up to this bastard, have us put it back into orbit, fully armed, just to save your own ass?

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Young Pilot #1 Hey, Hawk. This guys wants a scary ride.

Jason It's my birthday!

Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins [pause] Happy birthday.

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Tank Sullivan I'm going to go to my room now and cry.

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Jerry O'Neill I may be blind Frank, but my memory is perfect.

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Bob Gerson Francis D. Corvin.

Sara Holland Is he dead?

Bob Gerson Only if I'm lucky.

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[the younger astronauts have given Team Daedalus some Ensure as a gag]

Jerry O'Neill I'd drink this. It's good for your libido.

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Barbara Corvin Would you like me to read the instructions to you again?

Frank Corvin Let me tell you something, my dear. Those instructions were written by a fellow in Japan when they made this damn thing. They were probably translated by some gringo who was an expatriate American that couldn't get a job in this country. And then the Japanese guy probably translated him just to double check on him. You don't need these instructions. Not at all. Tear them up.

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Col. William 'Hawk' Hawkins Hello, Ikon. How we feeling today?

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Sara Holland I have never met a kid who didn't dream of being an astronaut when he grew up.