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Kinoafisha Films Nanny McPhee Nanny McPhee Movie Quotes

Nanny McPhee Movie Quotes

Nanny McPhee There is something you should understand about the way I work. When you need me but do not want me, then I must stay. When you want me but no longer need me, then I have to go. It's rather sad, really, but there it is.

[Nanny McPhee turns around to walk out of the room, but stops once she hears Simon]

Simon Brown We will never want you!

Nanny McPhee Then I will never go.

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Lily Evangeline, do you love Papa?

Evangeline Of course not! I know my place. That wouldn't be right. I mean... yes.

Lily Papa, do you love Evangeline?

Mr. Brown What are you saying? That- that would be totally improper. I mean a thing like that could- could never happen. I mean, obviously... yes.

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Nanny McPhee How's the reading coming along?

Evangeline Oh... all right. I still haven't gotten to the end of the story, though.

Nanny McPhee There's no need. You are the end of the story.

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Mr. Brown [monologue] I was confident that there was nothing they could do to upset her.

Nanny Whetstone [charges into the mortuary screaming] THEY'VE EATEN THE BABY!

Mr. Brown [monologue] Except that.

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Mr. Brown Nanny McPhee! Now she can't take the donkey, so what have you done?

Nanny McPhee I have done nothing, sir. The children have decided amongst themselves.

Mr. Brown Decided what?

Great Aunt Adelaide [off in distance] There you are, my dear.

Mr. Brown Not little Chrissy. it's Evangeline

[runs from the house]

Mr. Brown Evangeline!

Great Aunt Adelaide [in the carriage] Now my dear, tell me your name.

Mr. Brown [bolts down the road] Evangeline!

Nanny McPhee Tell me your name.

Mr. Brown [in the forest] Evangeline!

Great Aunt Adelaide Sit up straight, and tell me your name.

Mr. Brown [the carriage fades in the distance] NO! Evangeline!

Christianna Papa! Papa!

[races into her father's arms and hugs him]

Mr. Brown Oh thank...

[the other children run up to him]

Mr. Brown all of you? Oh... Then who is?

Evangeline [raises head for Aunt Adelaide to see] Evangeline... My name is Evangeline.

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[repeated line]

Nanny McPhee I did knock.

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Evangeline Sod my manners you old trout. This is the most fun I've had in weeks.

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Mrs. Quickly [to the children] There's only one thing men want. It's no wonder there are so many of you.

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Narrator Hello. Unfortunately, we must start the story with an empty chair. If it wasn't empty, however, we wouldn't have a story. But, it is, and we do, so we must tell it.

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Simon Brown I NEVER say "please"!

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Simon Brown You must feel at such a disadvantage, Nanny McPhee.

Nanny McPhee In what way?

Simon Brown We know your name... but you don't know ours.

[holds out hand]

Simon Brown Pleased to make your acquantence, I'm Oglinton Fartworthy.

[Children giggle whilst making farty noises]

Nanny McPhee [Shakes Simon's hand] How d'you do.

Simon Brown That's F-A-R-T, Fartworthy.

Tora Booger McHorsefanny.

Lily Knickers O'Muffin.

Eric Brown Sandra.

Christianna Bum.

Sebastian I'm Bum!

Christianna Oh, Bosoms.

[Children giggle out loud]

Baby Agatha Bum.

Christianna You can't be Bum, Aggie! Sebastian's Bum. You're Poop.

Baby Agatha Poop Bum.

Sebastian You can't be Poop and Bum!

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Mrs. Blatherwick [repeatedly, holding up a piece of paper and pointing to it, referring to the children not being allowed inside the kitchen] I have it in writin'.

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Great Aunt Adelaide Incest!

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Mr. Brown Milk?

Great Aunt Adelaide Definitely not! Most unhealthy!

Mr. Brown Sugar?

Great Aunt Adelaide Six, if you please.

Mr. Brown Six...

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Simon Brown [Nanny McPhee appears only after he taps her wand into the ground, he nervously quotes her] I-I *did* knock...

Nanny McPhee I know. I heard you.

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Great Aunt Adelaide If there's one thing I won't stand for, it's loose vowels!

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Mr. Brown I can't support my own family. I never have been able to. There are so many of you. But You're all so delicious. When Aggy came along and your mother was so ill, I said to her, "I think we will have to stop now, dear," and she said... She said, "I know."

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Tora [regarding the rattle that she has just taken from the baby] It was our mother's rattle. Give it back!

Mrs. Quickly I'm your mother now.

Mrs. Quickly [snaps rattle in half]

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[Repeated line]

Nanny McPhee The person you need is Nanny McPhee.

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Tora [deciding who will go with their great-aunt] Well, I'm the eldest girl. I'll go.

Lily No. I've always known I was destined for tragedy. I'll go.

Baby Agatha Aggy go.

Eric Brown Don't be silly, Aggy. You're not even a whole girl yet.

Christianna No. She wanted me. I'll go.

Sebastian You can't all go.

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Baby Agatha Beehive!

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Mr. Brown It wasn't really the baby they were eating. It was a chicken, actually.

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Great Aunt Adelaide I shall relieve you of one of your children and give it a home with me at Stitch Manor... As for your fortunate daughter - for it must be a girl and not one of those other things...

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Mr. Brown I must marry Quickly.

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Eric Brown BANG goes that theory.

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Tora [descussing the mishaps at the tea with their father] And the worms in the sandwiches.

Sebastian That was my idea!... I mean, my fault.

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Nanny McPhee Please, Mr. Brown, go back to your newspaper.

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Mrs. Quickly O, I do love my weddings!

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[first lines]

Mr. Brown We must begin our story, sad to say with an empty chair. If it were not empty, we would not have a story. But, it is. And we do, and it is time to tell it.

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[picks up a violin]

Mr. Brown Simon, cricket practice.

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Nanny McPhee Not at all.

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[repeated line given after making a sudden appearance]

Nanny McPhee I did knock.

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Eric Brown The nanny is a witch.

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[repeated line]

Nanny McPhee Hmm...

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Nanny McPhee [after using a winking donkey to rescue the children from their Great Aunt] One of you is going to have to go and it can't be the donkey.

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[Mr. Brown goes to the Nannies of Distinction. Mrs. Partridge locks the door and he tries to open the door, but it won't budge. He knocking on the door]

Mr. Brown Mrs. Partridge?

The Voice of Mrs Partridge We're closed!

[turns the sign and says "Closed"]

Mr. Brown There's been a tiny hiccup.

The Voice of Mrs Partridge We're not here!

[she put the blinds down]

Mr. Brown No, no. Please, let me in.

The Voice of Mrs Partridge Go away!

Mr. Brown I'm sure, there's time. Listen, they didn't eat the baby. It was a chicken, actually.

The Voice of Mrs Partridge There's no more nannies! You've had the lot!

[she slams the door and Mr. Brown leaves]

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[last lines]

Vicar Dearly beloved, we are gathered together to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony. Make a loud noise and rejoice and sing praise.

Nanny McPhee [narrating, as she nods to the empty chair of the Brown family matriarch then walks away into the countryside] There is something you should understand about the way I work. When you need me, but do not want me, then I must stay. When you want me, but no longer need me, then I have to go.

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Mrs. Blatherwick Where are you? You bloody half breeds, I'm ready and I'm armed!

[Eric comes down the dumbwaiter and bashes Mrs. Blatherwick with a frying pan knocking her out]

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Evangeline Poor him... and poor them.

Mrs. Blatherwick Poor them, my Aunt Fanny. They're the worstest, nastiest, horriblest... It'll be snow in August before this family's straightened out.

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Mrs. Blatherwick [happily seeing snow at Cedric and Evangeline's wedding] Well, what do you know? Snow! Snow in August!

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Mrs. Quickly Behave!