Cry-Baby Movie Quotes
Wanda's Father
Hi, Wanda honey.
Wanda's mother
You were on the radio.
Wanda
Would you just get me the fuck out of here?
Wanda's mother
What's "fuck" mean, Hector?
Wanda's Father
Oh, Maggie, it's just a teen nonsense word Wanda uses to make herself feel all grown-up.
Wanda's mother
Your Honor, could we take Wanda the fuck home?
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Cry-Baby
That's right, Allison. My father was the "Alphabet Bomber." He may have been crazy, but he was my pop. Only one I ever had.
Allison
God. I heard about the Alphabet Bomber. Bombs exploding in the... in the airport and barber shop...
Cry-Baby
That's right. All in alphabetical order. Car wash... drug store... I used to lay in my crib and hear him scream in his sleep..."A,B,C,D,E,F,G... BOOM! BOOM!"
Allison
But your mom...
Cry-Baby
My mother tried to stop him. She couldn't even spell, for Christ's sake, but they fried her too.
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Cry-Baby
Kiss me! Kiss me hard.
Allison
I've never given a French kiss before.
Cry-Baby
Watch, it's easy. You just open your mouth, and I open mine, and we wiggle our tongues together. And it feels real sexy.
Allison
I won't get mononucleosis, will I?
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The Judge
By the way, that's a shame about your face.
Hatchet-Face
There's nothing the matter with my face. I got character!
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[Allison stops Cry-Baby from fondling her]
Allison
I wanna let you, but I can't, for my parent's sake, Cry-Baby. They're both dead. I'm an orphan!
Cry-Baby
I'm sorry, Allison. But no wonder we're together, honey. I'm an orphan, too.
Allison
You are?
Cry-Baby
Yes! And orphans have special needs.
Allison
Just on the outside of the shirt, okay?
Cry-Baby
Is it okay with you?
Allison
Yes. Oh, yes!
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Wanda
Think Cry-Baby's got blue balls for the chick?
Hatchet Face
Allison's a square, Wanda. Cry-Baby don't dig squares.
Pepper
No, she's a scrape - part square, part drape. I think she's pretty.
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Allison
[to herself]
I'm so tired of being good.
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Hateful Guard at Maryland Training School for Boys
What's that on your face blubber boy? A booger?
Cry-Baby
Are you blind? It's a lonely tear drop!
Hateful Guard at Maryland Training School for Boys
Now, ain't that cute? It oughta go real good with your new haircut.
Cry-Baby
I ain't gettin' no haircut!
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Milton Hackett
Looks like somebody lost their laundry.
Lenora Frigid
Hello Cry-Baby. You've scorched me, man.
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Later, Lenora.
Lenora Frigid
But Cry-baby, I need a date for tonight's Jukebox Jamboree.
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Well, I'm solo, sugar.
Lenora Frigid
[offering to show her breasts]
Wanna see these gunboats? I give, Cry-baby. I give bare second on the first date.
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Use your mentality and cool down!
Wanda
Yeah, Lenora, your bosoms ain't nothin'!
Hatchet-Face
Better watch it, bozo! You might catch a cold!
Pepper
My brother wouldn't touch your titties with a ten-foot pole. He likes his women bad, Lenora, not cheap!
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Baldwin
We're squares, Allison, and squares got to stick together.
Allison
Yeah, but Drapes are people too. They just look different.
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Cry-Baby
[singing]
You'll be Queen, and I'll be your King / But if you leave my hive you're gonna feel my sting. / Cause you're my Queen.
Allison
[singing]
You're the King.
Cry-Baby
Cry-Baby, Allison: [singing] A king Queen.
Cry-Baby
Cry-Baby, Allison: [singing] And if you mess with us man, you're gonna cry, baby, cry, baby, cry, baby, cry.
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Allison
What's the matter, Cry-Baby?
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Everything's the matter!
Allison
It's just the thunderstorm. Heat lightening. It's sexy.
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
It's not sexy! Electricity makes me insane!
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Cry-Baby
I'm gonna sing tonight and thought she might like to hear it.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Baldwin, mind your manners.
Baldwin
This is what we think of your kind of music
[punches him]
Allison
How dare you hit him? You don't own me, Baldwin. I have the right to hear Cry-Baby sing.
Baldwin
Don't get all worked up honey. The punk got what he deserved.
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Ramona Rickettes
Cry-Baby, when you was a boy, you had to be the man of this family.
Uncle Belvedere Rickettes
But I taught you how to dress, didn't I, Cry-Baby?
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
You sure did, Uncle Belvedere.
Ramona Rickettes
Yeah well, you're the future now, boy. You're the only future for this god-forsaken family. And I want you to go out there tonight and sing, boy. I want you to sing your heart out! You can show him now, Belvedere. This took a lot of hubcaps, Cry-Baby.
[it's a motorcycle; everyone says "Wow"]
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Grandmother, Uncle Belvedere, you've made me the happiest juvenile delinquent in Baltimore! And guess what? I met a girl!
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Pepper
Don't go flip out mamma!
Hatchet-Face
Yeah! Sometimes shook up old ladies...
[licks knife]
Hatchet-Face
GET CUT!
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Wanda
You wanna learn about America, Inga? In America, we like boys! We like hot boys! Boys with roaming hands and rushing fingers!
Wanda's mother
Wanda honey, want some Ovaltine?
Inga
Ja, ja, ja!
Wanda
Yeah, I'm just a bebop baby, and I don't take nothing from no one! See ya later, daddy-os. Have a cool Yule and a frantic First!
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Allison
[to Cry Baby]
Mommy and Daddy took separate planes for safety, you know, in case one plane crashed, I'd still have a living parent. But Cry Baby, both planes crashed and I never saw my parents alive again.
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[Allison and The Whiffles finish singing "Mr. Sandman"... Uncle Belvidere whisks Allison down a rope]
Milton Hackett
Allison Vernon-Williams, the decision is yours...
Uncle Belvedere Rickettes
You sang with the squares, now sing with the drape!
[everyone cheers]
Baldwin
We'll get married and live in Suburbia. I love you Allison
Allison
I don't want to hurt you Baldwin.
Lenora Frigid
[snatches toy baby away from little girl]
I had my baby. Isn't he cute? I'm a square now. Wave to Allison.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
You may be a square Lenora, but you're still a tramp.
[Mrs. Vernon-Williams turns to look at Allison]
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Allison, pick the man who loves you the most.
Allison
[singing]
Please, Mr. Jailer, Won't you let my man go free? Please, Mr. Jailer, Won't you let my man go free? He don't belong in prison, Though he's guilty as can be, But the only crime he's guilty of, Is simply loving me...
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
[to Mrs. Vernon-Williams]
I may be a drape, but I love your granddaughter. And if that's a crime, I'll stand convicted, ma'am.
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The Judge
Mrs. Malnorowski, there is no smoking in this courtoom.
Hatchet's Mother
I pay taxes on cigarettes, don't I? And what do I get for those taxes? Happiness? *Hell* no! I get tuberculosis!
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Allison
It's really wild, but I'm-I'm afraid that I'm not gonna fit in here. You know, with your friends, and stuff.
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
You're cool, Allison. You just look square. Underneath it all, I think you're really hep.
Hatchet-Face
Well, what have we here?
Wanda
The first square to ever set foot in Turkey Point.
Pepper
Hey fine mama, welcome to the Jukebox Jamboree!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
These are the Cry-Baby girls. That's Wanda.
Wanda
Dig it, babe. You need a new look!
Hatchet-Face
Don't you got tits? Stick 'em out, for God's sake!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
That's Hatchet-face. She don't mean no harm.
Pepper
The first thing a Cry-Baby girl learns: our bazooms are our weapons!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Now, Pepper's pregnant, but she can fight like a man!
Wanda
I wouldn't be caught dead in a full skirt.
Pepper
Hey girls, what do you think? Let's give Allison here a bad girl beauty makeover. You game?
Allison
Sure! Think I got what it takes?
Hatchet-Face
Hatchet-Face, Wanda, Pepper: Whoa ho ho!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
You got it, Allison. You got it raw!
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Baldwin
You think you're a big man, Cry-Baby, but you're lower than your dead father! And guess who pulled the switch on that jerk? My grandpappy, that's who! And every Christmas since, my whole family gathers together and he retells the story of the day he electrocuted your daddy, and we just laugh!
Hatchet Face
Let me punch his ugly face!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
It's okay, Hatchet. You're beautiful, baby. But I'll take care of this maggot! Do you know how to play the automobile game called Chicken?
Baldwin
Sure! My car and your jalopy! We head toward one other at full speed. First one to turn the wheel before we smash is a chicken!
The Judge
Is that legal?
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Stop this insanity!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
I got some new rules, sucker! How 'bout you and me on top of the car?
Baldwin
[hesitates]
I'm man enough, you big cry baby!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
That's "Mr. Baby" to you! Fellas of the press, this chicken race tonight is for my daddy. And I'd like to sing something in his memory. Something hill-billy... something colored!
[Baldwin groans]
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Something my daddy would have loved!
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Allison, I'm sorry to get you locked up! But tonight, well, you were the coolest date I ever had!
Allison
But Cry-Baby, who was that girl? Why didn't you tell me you already had a lady friend?
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
That Lenora ain't nothing to me! I swear on my daddy's grave! I'm burning inside to touch you, baby!
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Pepper
That's my little snare drum.
Susie Q, Pepper Walker's Daughter
And, Ma, I swiped six hubcaps like a big girl!
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Cry-Baby
[singing]
# Well I ain't here 'cause I drive too fast. / And I'm too young to have a criminal past. / Some good behavior would be alright / But I don't seem to qualify. / I'm just out for a little fun / But I'm guilty until I'm twenty one / I guess I'm doing time for being young #
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Pepper
Pepper, Hatchet Face, Milton Hackett, Allison, Wanda: [singing] On our own.
Pepper
Pepper, Hatchet Face, Milton Hackett, Allison, Wanda: [singing] Almost grown.
Cry-Baby
[singing]
Come on pick a fight, we wish you would. I love being bad cause it sure feels good. Oh-oh!
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Baldwin
Allison! They beat me and kicked me... all because I love you.
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Allison
He lied to me, Grandmother. And the whole worid knows that I'm just a Drape fool.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Oh, heavy hangs the head, that last night wore the crown.
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Lenora Frigid
[to the reporters] Boy, do I have a story for you!
Reporter
How does it feel to be a juvenile delinquent?
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
It feels good, man! I've never been so happy in my life!
[Lenora runs up and throws her arms around Cry-baby right before he's taken away]
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Lenora, you filthy hag! I wouldn't let you shine my boots! Allison's my girl! A-L-L-I-S-O-N fellas!
Reporter
When did he propose?
Lenora Frigid
Just last night. You see, I'm pregnant with his child. Well, you know that Cry-baby is an orphan. He wants his baby to have a real family... the family that he himself never had.
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[first lines]
Wanda's mother
Hi Kids. Remember, always look both ways before crossing.
Wanda
[embarassed]
Mother!
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[last lines]
Baldwin
Chicken!
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Cry-Baby
[singing]
# The woman want a Cadillac, she don't want no man / I used to have a woman, said she loved me so #
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Cry-Baby
[singing]
# Now, I can't let the right thing stand in my way / Someday, baby, I'll know better / Right now making her pay #
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Cry-Baby
[singing]
I had my first cigarette before I could walk / And I was strumming this guitar before I could talk, Cause I'm the King.
Hatchet-Face
Hatchet-Face, Wanda, Pepper, Milton Hackett, Allison: [singing] King Cry Baby.
Hatchet-Face
Hatchet-Face, Wanda, Pepper, Milton Hackett, Allison: [singing] King Cry Baby.
Hatchet-Face
Hatchet-Face, Wanda, Pepper, Milton Hackett, Allison: [singing] King Cry Baby.
Cry-Baby
[singing]
A King Cry Baby with a tear in my eye / If you mess with the King you're gonna cry, baby, cry, baby, cry, baby, cry.
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Allison
Oh, Crybaby, your fingers feel so good!
Cry-Baby
I've been saving it up for a girl like you.
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Uncle Belvedere Rickettes
Today's a special day for me and your grandmother. We've been together ten whole years.
Ramona Rickettes
I'm just so proud of all my drape children! Oh Wanda, you sure is pretty in them tight clothes, all painted up like trash!
Wanda
I wish you and Belvedere were my parents.
Ramona Rickettes
Now Milton, boy, you are everything a man should be: you're young, stupid, and... mean!
Milton Hackett
We're gonna play some cool music for you tonight, Ramona.
Ramona Rickettes
And Hatchet-face, oh honey! You're just like me. Now, you put the T in tough! So hard you could've been eating nails for breakfast! But that's the way a woman's got to be these days.
Hatchet-Face
I'd kick a square's ass for you in a minute, Mrs. Rickettes!
Ramona Rickettes
Oh, this is the best gang my grandson could ever have!
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Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Baldwin, please be a gentleman and call off this race. It's too dangerous!
Baldwin
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, you were born a square and you're gonna die a square. You're coming with me!
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The Judge
[to the courtroom]
What a sad vision of today's youth. The juvenile authorities have had it with Drape gangs.
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Wanda's mother
[to Wanda]
Let's all put on a folk hat and learn something about a foreign culture!
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The Judge
[to Cry Baby]
The only place you're going to sing is in jail.
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Milton's Father
[to Milton]
God's in her gullet. And he's in yours, too!
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Baldwin
[to Allison, about Cry Baby]
Honey, his kind of music isn't even on the Hit Parade!
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Cry-Baby
I can sing pretty good.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
'Well,' not 'good.' Haven't you *ever* heard of the English language?
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Milton's Father
[to the Teenagers]
Let Jesus Christ be your gang-leader!
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The Judge
[to Hatchet Face]
I see that your parents haven't taken the trouble to come to get you.
Hatchet's Father
Oh, yes, we did. You happy now, Mona? Huh? You finally did it. You put your own Mother in an iron lung.
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Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Your Honour, I am Allison's grandmother.
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Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the annual RSVP Talent Show.
The Squares
Good afternoon, Mrs. Vernon-Williams.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
First, I must apologize for my frazzled nerves. However, this afternoon we were attacked by a gang of juvenile delinquents.
[audience gasps]
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
It's alright. No one was injured. Juvenile delinquents are everywhere. Right here in this community. Boys with long hair and tattoos who spit on the sidewalk. Girls who wear tight slacks. Hysterectomy pants, I call them. And if one of these creatures ever approach you on the street, you are to silently repeat to yourself the four "B's" you learned here at RSVP. And what are they, children, the four "B's"?
The Squares
Beauty, brains, breeding and bounty!
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Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
I have told you, Baldwin, a young lady does not like to be pawed.
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Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
I will say this once and once only. Stay away from my granddaughter, you common juvenile delinquents.
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Pepper
Greetin's, Grannio.
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Wanda's mother
Look left, look right. That's right, then walk. Good teenagers!
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Allison
[singing]
My friends all know it, How I adore him, I've whispered to angels, What I'd do for him, He is the answer, To a teenage prayer...
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Allison
[singing]
Give him a pair of eyes with a come hither gleam, Give him a lonely heart like Pagliacci, And lots of wavy hair like Liberace...
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
[singing]
Teardrops are falling, Out of my eyes, Teardrops are falling, I wonder why, Teardrops are falling...
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Allison
Cry-Baby Walker, I hope you're happy with Lenora. I only have one thing to say to you. I think you're a liar and a cad, and I spit on your tears.
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Allison
Maybe Cry-Baby can sing. Something cool, something hep.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
And where did you learn those vulgar jazz words? Your poor dead parents would turn over in their graves.
Baldwin
It's those jukebox records she listens to. Honey, his kind of music isn't even on the Hit Parade.
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Ko Jo Jackson
Ko Jo Jackson's art photography right here! Be a nudie-cutie, make good money to bootie. Hey, I'm payin' three bucks a shot. What the hell, you got it, why not show it, right?
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Nobody's going to turn me Square, Dupree. I want my girl, I want my family, and I want my gang. Thanks for the tattoo.
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Wanda
I'm blowin' this joint.
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Ramona Rickettes
Dig it, all you hep cats and cool chicks.
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Hateful Guard at Maryland Training School for Boys
God bless Dwight Eisenhower.
Boys at Maryland Training School for Boys
God bless Dwight Eisenhower.
Hateful Guard at Maryland Training School for Boys
God bless Roy Cohn.
Boys at Maryland Training School for Boys
God bless Roy Cohn.
Hateful Guard at Maryland Training School for Boys
God bless Richard Nixon.
Boys at Maryland Training School for Boys
God bless Richard Nixon.
Hateful Guard at Maryland Training School for Boys
Nighty-night, boys.
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The Judge
Cry-Baby Walker, society has given you a second chance. You're rehabilitated now. Here's three dollars and fifty cents. And a pair of clean underwear.
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, I hear you're havin' a talent show at your charm school today.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
I can barely imagine what *you* would call music.
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Milton Hackett
Jeez, Mom and Dad, go home. You're embarrassing me. I'm a teenager. I wanna live!
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
Been to Turkey Point before?
Allison
My Grandmother wouldn't let me. She calls it the Redneck Riviera.
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Uncle Belvedere Rickettes
I taught you how to dress, didn't I?
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Milton's Father
Imagine our shame. Our only child, and he carries illegal weapons, drives fast cars, and wears clothes obviously designed by homosexuals.
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Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
One single, salty tear is all that they will ever suck out of this Cry-Baby.
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The Judge
I'm going to release these delinquents to their parents' custody. And if they were mine, I'd give them a bare-assed whipping.
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Ramona Rickettes
And now, the baddest baby of them all, the man you came here fer, the big boo-hoo, the terrible teardrop, ladies and gentlemen, my grandson, Cry-Baby!
Wade "Cry-Baby" Walker
[singing]
Well, one for all and all for one, And all we want is to have some fun...
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Allison
Please! It's not a school night, and I have been a good girl. Just one night of happiness, that's *all* I ask.
Mrs. Vernon-Williams, Allison's Grandmother
But what if you get your dress dirty?
Allison
Thank you, Grandmother.
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Ko Jo Jackson
Hey, you! Yeah, you, the looker with the Class-A sealed-beam headlights. You wanna pose for Ko Jo?
Wanda
Beat it, creep.
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