Friends with Kids Movie Quotes
Jason Fryman
You think that we don't love each other? You know, I have loved this girl for nineteen years, Ben. That is fully half my life. I know everything there is to know about her. I know the mood she's in when she wakes up in the morning - always happy, ready for the day. Can you imagine? I know that she is honest; she won't even take the little shampoo bottles from the hotel room, or sneak into the movie theater for a double feature. She always buys a second ticket. Always. I know that we have the same values, we have the same taste, we have the same sense of humor. I know that we both think that organized religion is completely full of shit. I know that if she is ever paralyzed from the neck down, she would like me to unplug her - and I will. I know her position on just about everything, and I am on board. I am on board with everything about her, so you tell me, Ben. What better woman could I have picked to be the mother of my child?
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Ben
So, why didn't you guys ever even try to get together?
Jason Fryman
It's too much familiarity. It's like she's one of my limbs.
Ben
And that's bad, because...?
Jason Fryman
Because I hate myself.
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Jason Fryman
Please, please, just let me fuck the shit out of you right now. And if you're not convinced afterwards that I am into you in every possible way a person can be into another person, then I promise I will never try to kiss you, or fuck you, or impregnate you ever again, as long as I live.
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Jason Fryman
Slow painful death by disease... or watching the love of your life die a slow painful death by disease?
Julie Keller
A. Definitely A. Much worse to be without the person you love than to have a slow painful death.
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Julie Keller
You?
Jason Fryman
Oh, B.
Julie Keller
Really? You would rather watch the love of your life die slowly and painfully?
Jason Fryman
Well, it wouldn't be awesome, but better them than me. Got a lot of good years left.
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Jason Fryman
Julie, I love you, so much, as a friend.
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Jason Fryman
Ah, she'll be fine. She's gotta great
[looks under the comforter]
Jason Fryman
sense of humour.
Julie Keller
You're such an asshole.
Jason Fryman
I know.
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Jason Fryman
Look, we really wanna have a kid.
Julie Keller
Yeah.
Jason Fryman
We just don't want to subject that kid to our tragic marriage.
Leslie
Our tragic marriage?
Jason Fryman
No, OUR
[indicating Julie and himself]
Jason Fryman
tragic marriage.
Julie Keller
The one we would have.
Jason Fryman
Us.
Julie Keller
I mean see, we-we, um, we just, you know we don't wanna fall in-in the trap that most of our friends have...
[realises that she is saying the right thing in front of the wrong persons]
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Jason Fryman
But, I never heard from you because you were fucking Dirk Diggler.
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Julie Keller
I have heard so much about you, I feel like I know you. I've two of your thongs in my apartment.
[Awkward pause]
Julie Keller
I washed them.
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Julie Keller
Tell me that you will be 100% committed to this , half the time.
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Missy
Y'know, some people just aren't meant to be parents.
Kurt
Look, none of us really ever thinks that we're doing a perfect job. But it's just par for the course, that's the gig. But then you have those moments, you come home from work, you open the door, you're kid run in and gives you a big hug, and it's kind of game over, right? And that the kind of whole thing right there, you know.
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